If push comes to shove, we’ll relocate. Hopefully somewhere close by so not much changes. I can’t afford to stay in this area though because nobody is going to give me rent for that price around here, but I need to say whatever is necessary to keep Sherry calm. “I just need to think about this a bit. Figure it out. Can you… stay later tonight? Lock the place up? I need to leave so I can make some phone calls, you know, get my head around this.”
“Yeah, of course,” Sherry stated softly.
“Thank you.”
Lauren put on a cheery smile, patted Sherry on the shoulder, and made her way towards the back where her office awaited her. Once inside, she closed and locked the door, her chest heaving, her heart pounding so hard, it hurt. The muted sounds of soft music played from the store, and the scent of evergreen from her oil diffuser filled the air. She slipped into the chair behind a desk covered in papers that needed to be reviewed and signed, a closed laptop, and a mountain of second-hand books she’d collected for resale from an estate that needed to be sorted.
I love it here. I don’t want to start over. I mean, it’s not exactly starting over if I move, but these people know me. This is our community. I have regulars who come in every single week, a few of them multiple times a week. They purchase a book or two, drink coffee, invite their friends… Those are the customers that keep the lights on. Then there are the book club members that come here every month. They are always so sweet and engaging and I love overhearing their enthusiasm. Some of the younger kids come over here with their parents to be read to or for the toddler puppet shows. A few of my other patrons bike over from their apartments, condos, and houses. I have seniors that have no transportation who live a block or less away and this is part of their weekly schedule – something they look forward to! We even have a bingo night here for them. What about the college kids who leave campus and come here to study in peace? What about the groups that play chess and the summer literacy program? My location is tied into that! I know all of these people! We’re family!
Her brain banged with a budding headache, and she massaged the back of her neck for a while, then ran her fingers through her hair. Closing her eyes, she let the bittersweet memories flood her mind. Her eyes watered, but she refused to open them and let the tears fall.
She sat there, simply being. Hurting. Then, after what seemed like a long time, she stood. Slipping on her long black cardigan, she grabbed her empty lunch pail and purse and made her way out of there. She quickly waved to Sherry, but made no eye contact when the woman yelled out a customary, “See ya tomorrow!”
She opened the front door to exit and the bell chimed. A couple of people rushed past her, big smiles on their faces and the tinkle of their laughter a balm to the soul. Yet, she couldn’t appreciate the beauty of that as she smiled back. The gesture hurt to maintain until they were out of sight. Her store door closed behind her and her shoes beat against the concrete – green and taupe wedge heels with a palm leaf print, her favorite pair.
As she made her way down the sidewalk, she looked up at the sky. Storm clouds. I could smell it before I could see it… She made it to her car and opened the door as soon as the first drops kissed her wrists and face. Settling into the driver’s seat, she forced herself to take several deep breaths. All she wished to do was go home, heat up her leftover roast duck and mixed vegetables in the microwave, and eat it with a glass of wine while she watched a TV program. Sometime that evening, she’d get online and research her options, then possibly reach out to an attorney if she had any unanswered questions after her online query.
I need to clear my mind… definitely need to find a program to just relax for a minute. Hopefully a good documentary. Maybe one about murder… Something she could live vicariously through, to help pour out her rage. The malevolent shell of a man had marched