“No, but he won't care. He told me I could buy you some more clothes.”
“He bought most of my clothes now.”
“Yeah, he did pretty good. But I think you should pick them from now on, and he agreed. Whattaya think?”
“It sounds awesome!”
We belted out a few pop songs on the way up the canyon, and I luxuriated in the brightness of unfiltered Ava. Rarely did I get her so full of life, and it seemed the prospect of a new adventure brightened her. Benjamin texted me sometime in our travel, so when I stopped at our first red light, I glanced at the phone.
Benjamin: Mom's up and out of ICU as of this morning. Mav and I plan to head back this evening.
* * *
Serafina: Good news! I work tonight, so Ava is going to stay with Bethany.
* * *
Benjamin: Thanks for arranging that.
* * *
Serafina: My pleasure. Fly safe! I'll see you soon?
* * *
Benjamin: I'll stop by to see you tonight.
My stomach gave a little flip. Technically, he could just go see his daughter at Maverick's and then I'd see him Monday morning. But maybe he needed to talk about something with Ava, or just wanted to touch base.
Because we were friends.
I ditched my phone when the light turned, and minutes later Ava and I stood in the middle of a girls section at my favorite clothing store. She stared, wide-eyed, at the glittering options.
“I can buy these?” she whispered.
With effort, I hid my suspicions and said easily, “Whatever you want. You choose. I'll control the budget, okay? You tell me what you like. Let's start there.”
“Dad said I could?”
“He's happy for you to get something you want.”
She nodded wordlessly, but I couldn't say that she was convinced. Why so reticent about Benjamin allowing her to get new clothes? It didn't add up to the dynamic I'd seen between them, but I kept my attention open. Slowly, Ava approached several different shirts. At first, she strolled past them.
When she reached out to touch a bright blue dress with lace trim, her fingers fell away just short of the material. Instead of throwing herself into the options, she just stared at them, a paralyzed expression on her face. I crouched next to her when tears sparkled in her eyes.
“Ava?”
“Mom said Dad wasn't nice,” she whispered. A tear dropped down her cheek. Her lip trembled a little before she pressed on, her voice strained now. “She said I'd never be happy with him, and if he tried to take me away, I should never let him. I could . . . I could only be happy with her. She said he didn't like to spend money and I'd never feel happy at his house.”
The sound of my heart cracking followed her little sob. I grabbed her shoulders so she faced me. Tears spilled down her cheeks in earnest as she cried, “Mom said Daddy would never love me!”
Unable to bear another moment, I crushed her to me. She sobbed into my shoulder. Big, heaving cries as she clung to me. Tears stung hot in my eyes, but I forced them back. This little girl who had lost so much . . . how had she even survived in the first place? I wanted to rake my nails across Sadie's face. What kind of person told a little girl such a thing? No wonder Ava had been so reserved around Benjamin.
When she'd cried the worst of it out, I pulled her away to look at me. Then I tucked a piece of hair behind her ear and said, “I love you, Ava. Do you know who else loves you? More than anything in this world?”
She shook her head, wiping a snotty nose off on the back of her sleeve.
“Your daddy. He loves you so much.”
She hiccupped.
“Do you think what your Mom said is true? Do you think you'll always be unhappy with your Dad?”
Mute, she shook her head. Her cheeks were a tearstained red when I gently wiped them off with my thumb.
“I don't either,” I whispered. “I think your Dad loves you more than anything, and he wants you to be happy. That's part of the reason we're getting you new, fun clothes. How does that feel?”
“Good,” she mumbled.
“Are you happy with your Dad?”
She nodded reluctantly, her brow wrinkled. She let out a long breath, and in her silence, I thought I saw the answer.
“Are you afraid your Mom would be mad because you're happy with him?”