Fatal Secrets - Desiree Holt Page 0,57
I balked at his plans, he wrote me off. Anyway, I’m going. I found a great cabin to rent. There’s a whole group of them clustered at the foothills of the Crazy Mountains. I haven’t exactly broadcast my intentions, so I’m sure my target has no idea that I am trying to identify him.”
“Yet.”
“What?”
“He has no idea yet.”
She sighed again. “Grey, I’ll be fine.”
“Yes, you will,” he agreed, “because I’m getting you protection.”
“What?” She shook her head. “No, you are not sending someone with me.”
“That’s right, I’m not. But I called Hank Patterson in Eagle Rock. He heads the Brotherhood Protectors. I told him what you needed, and he’s assigning one of his best to you. A former SEAL named Scot Nolan. He’ll be waiting when you get to your cabin.”
“Grey, this man I’m trying to find, whoever he is, has no idea I’m hunting him. That I’m digging into these cases. And I’ll fly well under the radar. I don’t need a babysitter.”
“If he’s as powerful as you think, your radar won’t do you any good. And this man’s a hell of a lot more than a babysitter.”
“Then maybe I can smoke the asshole out.”
“Not your smartest idea,” Grey objected. “But if that happens, you’ll definitely need protection. I take care of my friends, Jenna. Deal with it.”
Jenna gritted her teeth. “If I’m walking around with a guy who might as well have a sign on him that says bodyguard, how far do you think I’ll get?”
“A lot further than if you’re dead. Anyway, Hank Patterson and I got it all figured out. Nolan’s going to be your boyfriend.”
“My—” She’d stared at him. “Oh, great. I barely hook up with anyone I know, never mind a complete stranger. No. Just no.”
“Too bad. We’ve got it all worked out. Hank’s already made the assignment, and Scot Nolan has your file so he can know as much about you as anyone else does.”
“This sucks, Grey.”
“Not as much as being raped again or dead,” he pointed out. “Anyway, you have nothing to worry about him crossing the line. Scot’s a loner. Hank says he wishes the guy would find a nice woman and settle down but, he seems to be fine by himself.”
“Good, because I am, too.”
So here she was, about to face her demons.
I can do this. I can definitely do this. No, I have to do this or I’ll never have any peace.
She murmured the words over and over to herself as she steered her rental SUV down the highway from Bozeman to the cabin she’d rented at the foothills of the Crazy Mountains. She hadn’t wanted to come back here, but if she was going to see this thing through to the end, finally, she had to do it. But she wasn’t staying anywhere near Helena, that was for damn sure. Nor had she bothered to let her stepfather—a man she’d hated from the day she met him—know she’d be here. That would be defeating the purpose.
Then the emails showed up, and everything came rushing back like a tidal wave, engulfing her. Thinking about it now sent memories skittering through her brain, along with the words of her therapist.
Rape is the most demeaning kind of attack. It robs the victim of…
Out of nowhere, the feel of hard masculine hands covering her eyes and mouth popped into her brain, choking her. The scent of alcohol so strong. Someone dragging her into a room, throwing her on the bed—
Choking, she swerved to the shoulder and stopped the car, slamming her hand against the steering wheel
No, no, no. I will not think of it.
Deep breaths. That’s what her psychologist always told her. Take long deep breaths. Inhale. Exhale. That’s what she’d been doing for the past ten years, ever since she’d decided dealing with the aftermath by herself wasn’t working.
Inhale. Exhale.
Damn. She’d thought she had the recurring images and sensations under control. She rolled down her window and drew in a deep breath of the fresh Crazy Mountains air, spiced with the essence of white birch and lodgepole pines.
Inhale. Exhale.
She felt all her inner muscles relax, the tension easing as it usually did, her breathing evening out. She closed her eyes and counted to fifty, as her therapist had told her to do, and called up pleasant images—the sun setting over the water, A child on a playground, a dog chasing a stick on the beach. After a few moments she felt calm enough to continue. She was almost there. Almost in