Fast Lane - Kristen Ashley Page 0,88

it’s time for deep reflection.

[Laughs]

So, he takes off surfin’. All over everywhere.

Hawaii. Bali. Thailand. Australia. Brazil.

[Lifts hand and presses it out]

Now, don’t judge, and if you weren’t going to, I’ll warn whoever you tell these tales to not to do it.

My mom judged.

She was all “That boy never had any sense. He should get to church. He should talk to God.”

She said that once and I replied, “He is, Mom.”

She got what I was saying and never mentioned it again.

As you know, this was when Shawn went off and did his own thing.

[Starts laughing slowly but this becomes stronger and stronger before he controls it]

Takes us five albums to win our first award.

Shawn wins three on his first solo effort.

[Bursts straight into laughter]

Can we talk about that, even briefly? The awards the Roadmasters won for The Cycle and “Musk”?

What do you wanna know?

Mancosa accepted all of them on your behalf.

Yeah.

Why?

[Leans forward]

My call and no one argued with it.

It was because we’re a band.

It was because we’d made a family.

If Preacher wasn’t with us and Lyla wasn’t in a gown, sitting in the audience, we weren’t pitching up.

We didn’t realize it, but it was all or nothing from the very beginning, rolling out of my parents’ driveway with the Star Wars theme playing.

Barfights and bloody noses and not mentioning we skipped breakfast and lunch when we were sharin’ two small orders of fries between the four of us with our quarter pounders with cheese we ate for dinner.

We’re all in with the bad.

We didn’t get to have the good unless we were the same.

This, however, proved further fodder for breakup rumors.

You know, I didn’t then, and I don’t now.

You didn’t…what?

Give a fuck.

Dave goes off and forms the Second Coming.

[Again, starts laughing but does it shaking his head]

The Second Coming.

He’s getting all this flak from the Christian right and all anyone can talk about when this offshoot he’s doin’ gets press is how the title signals the end of the Roadmasters.

He calls me and bitches about this and I’m all “Dave, you named your band the Second Coming.”

“All our songs are about sex, dude,” he replies. “The good kind where you get her off twice.”

[Begins laughing uncontrollably, through it speaking]

“I don’t know why folks aren’t getting it,” he goes on.

“You do know people refer to the return of the son of God, the one and only Jesus Christ as the second coming,” I tell him.

“Yeah. But the dude doesn’t own the name,” he replies.

[Dissolves into laughter]

You know, he showed them though.

I loved that. Loved watching it.

Same thing happened with Ringo Starr.

Beatles broke up and everyone thought, “Oh, poor Ringo. What’s he gonna do now?”

Well, I don’t know. Be the first of that group to produce hits and go on to have a kickass career?

[Lifts fist in the air and opens fingers like he’s dropping something]

Boom.

Same thing with Dave Grohl.

I mean, Cobain is the band, what’s this kid gonna fuckin’ do?

I’ll tell you what.

Foo Fighters and Grohl being the Where’s Waldo of rock. I mean, the guy is everywhere. He even plays the fuckin’ CMAs, for fuck’s sake.

[Chuckles]

That guy is the fuckin’ bomb.

The Second Coming was a badass band. Dirty and raunchy and fun.

I love their shit.

Still listen to it all the time.

And she won’t say it straight out, but Natalie likes them more than the Roadmasters.

You haven’t touched on Leeanne Brewster’s return to the world of the Roadmasters.

Well, I mean, it’s common knowledge.

She told Tim she’s on the Pill, Tim can be a dope, he goes in unprotected, we’re in the thick of shit with everything hitting with Preach’s parents, she shows and tells Timmy she’s pregnant.

He says, “We’ll get a DNA test after the kid is born. It’s mine, I’ll reimburse you for your medical expenses and we’ll make a plan to swing support and custody.”

She says, “I’d prefer to raise my child with two parents together.”

He goes surfing.

[Barks with laughter]

Brody’s great, sister.

[His expression takes on a meaningful look]

The image of his dad.

You’d think, Tim blond, Leeanne dark, he’d get her coloring, but he didn’t.

Blond-haired, blue-eyed surfer boy.

[Grins fondly]

Love that kid.

And then there’s you.

[Nods]

I got into producing.

Sold a few songs.

And I waited for Preacher to come back to us.

Lyla:

The room has become a menagerie as her daughter has returned with the dogs then left in the Mini. Thus, in addition to the two cats, there’s the mutt and the Burmese mountain dog lying on the floor by where she’s sitting, and a tiny, black-eyed, white-furred Maltese that is vying with the