here last year. I could tell it really affected her, because she wasn’t yelling at me like she normally would, and we sorted through all your lies without her once calling it a sin. Which we all know is big for her. But she was genuinely worried about you and couldn’t get ahold of you.” She opens her laptop, and taps a few keys. FaceTime pops up. “So I told her I’d go back immediately and we could all talk it out.”
I nod. “Okay, I’m ready.”
The call connects, and my parents are in the view. Mom and Dad sit at the barstools at the counter in our kitchen back home, and Aunt Leah adjusts the view so both of us are in it.
“Hi, Marty,” Mom says. “First of all, we love you. I hope you know that. Secondly, we have a lot to talk about here. But maybe you should catch us up on your time in London.”
“And … Wales. And Italy.” Dad laughs. “You never should have showed me how to use that Find Your Friends app.”
My cheeks flush hotly, but I hold myself out of my shell for just long enough to explain myself. From the beginning. The full story. New Marty’s got one last job to do.
“Marty,” Aunt Leah says once the call ends, “I know it’s hard. But you’ve got to give them a chance to—”
“How can I? My family is supposed to be my rock, the one thing that keeps me going no matter what. They’re not going to just become understanding and start waving pride flags overnight, and I shouldn’t be forced to wait while they figure it out.”
“You’re right,” Shane says. “But you can have more than one family. You can choose your family.”
Aunt Leah laughs. “And remember that adults like me and your mum—we don’t have our shite together. We can try to be a rock all we want, but we’ve got plenty of cracks. It’s rough to grow up and learn your parents aren’t quite as put together as you think they are. So be mad, be resentful, but most of all … be honest. Things may change, or maybe they won’t, but you won’t know until you try.”
“I can choose my family,” I echo. “I mean, you’re my family. And so is Sophie, and Dani, and that whole group.”
Shane comes over to give me a hug. My aunt makes it a group hug. “And we’re not going anywhere,” he says.
THIRTY-SEVEN
I barely picked at my dinner last night, which was the latest reminder that there’s a lot still lingering inside me. But I asked Shane to help me be accountable for it in the future. After the call with my parents, and the lie unraveling, it’s clear: a guy can’t change overnight.
I’ve dropped the New Marty persona. I’m trying to learn and get better every day. I’m doing things that make me happy and make me closer to my new family.
Today’s a big day. Dani used our videos and got us an audition for a busking license. And after that, it’s London Pride. Take two. I’ve got a sack of glitter, and we’re all going to be decked out in the brightest colors we can find. We’re doing it right this time … as long as we can get through this audition in one piece.
Before I get out of bed to start this hectic day, I decide to bite the bullet and pull up Mom’s email. The one I got in the airport, right before I sent them last year’s diary. I’m still trying to figure out if I want them in my life, and if so, to what extent I want them to be here. Aunt Leah’s given me an extension on my stay here, but I don’t know how long that’ll last.
I don’t know anything. But I open the email.
Marty,
I am furious right now. I know your friend Megan has been acting strangely lately, but I heard what she did to you, telling everyone at Avery High about your sexuality without your permission. It’s disgraceful, and I am so sorry you’re going through this.
I want you to know that I found this out at church. It was everything I had feared. My “friends” all finding out that my son was gay, then coming to me offering scriptures and fake support … and one even mentioned a special program I could send you to that was sponsored by this very church.
Now, I know I haven’t been the most accepting, and