love stood strong in times of desperation and trials, no matter what conflicts lay in its path. How often had she thought the same thing after Doug had walked out. If their love had been strong, nothing could have pulled him away from his devotion to his wife and daughter.
Real love. Now to face whether what she felt for Ross was real or something else. She’d experienced the emotion of love in his arms and the joy of partnership in their good times and bad. She longed to be with him even now, to feel his arms around her, supporting her and making her feel cherished. To Kelsey, that felt like real love.
Shaking her head, Kelsey ignored her thoughts. She pulled the car keys from the ignition. A room waited for her.
“Lucy.” She laid her hand on Lucy’s arm.
She opened her eyes, a glazed look curtaining her face before she jerked upward and blinked. “I fell asleep.”
“You did, but that’s okay. It’s been a difficult day for you…for us.”
Lucy’s lids lowered and opened. “I wish Daddy hadn’t died.”
“So do I.” A chill ran down her arms. She meant what she’d said. That would have given her time to forgive him and might have opened a door for Doug to be a better father to Lucy. Regret. Regret. The emotion belonged to the past. The past was over and gone. Now she faced the future and regret should be replaced with wiser decisions and better choices.
She opened the door and slipped from her sedan. Lucy followed. Kelsey hit the lock button and pulled her room key from her pocket. She slipped it into the outside door’s lock and it clicked open. She beckoned Lucy to go in first. The room was a short distance down the hallway, and when she turned on the light, loneliness overcame her.
Tonight Karen would go home and crawl into an empty bed, knowing Doug would never be back to keep her warm. Kelsey had experienced that same sadness once. Yet tonight instead of the bitterness she’d clung to for so long, sorrow had washed it away. She grieved for Karen and Lucy’s loss.
Kelsey looked up as Lucy carried her pajamas into the bathroom. In moments, the shower sounded, and Kelsey settled into the only easy chair and closed her eyes. She dreaded tomorrow. Because Doug and Karen had no church connection, the funeral would be held at the funeral home. Doug’s father and sister had come for the funeral, and she’d spoken to them, but it had been years. She’d been sad to learn that Doug’s mother had died from cancer three years ago. Doug had never told her. Or maybe she hadn’t listened. The weight of that possibility dragged her back into a dark place.
Grateful when the shower stopped, Kelsey rose and pulled out her nightgown. She refused to wallow in her bad choices and mistakes. She’d blamed Doug so long that she’d overlooked her own part in undoing any hope for a relationship after their divorce. Divorce had been a word she’d learned to dismiss. It wouldn’t happen to her, a Christian. But it had and, unknowingly, she’d remained faithful to a dead marriage.
Today she would be free from the bonds of her oath to Doug, but the thought gave her no pleasure. Instead, she’d faced what she had to do. Now she needed to figure out how.
Lucy came out from her shower with rosy cheeks and climbed into bed. She fell asleep before Kelsey had slipped into the bathroom.
Kelsey didn’t linger in the shower. She greeted the bed, snapped off the light and slid under the covers, her prayers rising for answers and for a night of rest.
At the funeral luncheon, Doug’s father and sister chose seats across from Lucy, and though Kelsey felt uncomfortable, she accepted the situation. They seemed to know a few people there, and he was Lucy’s grandfather and she, Lucy’s aunt. They’d talked about a few things, and she found that neither one harbored any grudges. In fact, Doug’s father apologized for his son’s actions. Over the years, he had never offered any solace or comment on the breakup of her and Doug’s marriage, and the only attention he and his wife had paid to Lucy was an occasional card with a check. Doug’s parents apparently focused on his sister’s children, who were nearby and didn’t remind them of Doug’s behavior. She sensed, too, that they didn’t know how to deal with Lucy’s illness. Though she’d resented their