The Falling: A Dark Mafia Romance (Finding Forever, #3) - Jessie Jones Page 0,2
considered a brother sit back in the chair and down another drink of whiskey. His heart was breaking for John. The Brit had a very bad habit of blaming himself for things beyond his control, and clearly, what had happened to Gillian was no exception. How could Patrick help John see that he could not have controlled the turn of events?
"Johnny," the Irishman began softly as he walked around the bed and sat down beside him. "You have got to stop blaming yourself for things you can't control. You didn't put Gillian in harm's way; Galen did. You have had our men watching Gillian's every move 24/7 since leaving Kenric Manor. There was no way that you could have anticipated Galen making a move on her the way he did."
"What if kitten blames me, Pat? What do I do then?" John asked, unshed tears in his chestnut eyes as he looked at the Irishman. "You know that she has led a low-key life intentionally. I made her vulnerable by putting her in the media. I did that for selfish reasons, mate. I wanted the world to know she now belongs to me. I can't apologize for that."
"You won't have to, boyo. Gillian is not going to blame you for what happened. You told me, yourself, that she agreed to come back to London with you. That's not the action of a woman who doesn't want to be linked to you."
"She's not ready for our world, Pat. She said as much last night."
"Then let her go, mate," Patrick said softly as John's eyes shot to his. "If you don't think Gillian can handle it, then you need to let her go."
"I can't." John derisively laughed before taking another long drink of whiskey. "I love her, boyo. I couldn't even make it a fucking week without her."
"I know," the Irishman replied, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips as he looked at the subject of their conversation. He and John had known the American a whole week, and she had completely changed both their lives. "Gillian's strong, Johnny. She can handle this…us."
"And if she can't?"
Patrick said nothing in response to John's question. The Brit was in one of his moods, and nothing he could say would matter. He only hoped that Gillian would help ease John's fears when she woke up. Standing up, Patrick stretched out his tired frame. Like his brother, the Irishman had been unable to sleep since Gillian had left Kenric Manor. Normally, Patrick drowned himself in alcohol and pussy when he couldn't sleep, but he had been unable to do either since meeting the American. Watching his brother take another drink of whiskey, the blond-haired giant shook his head in disgust before he ripped the bottle out of John's hand and threw it across the room.
As the bottle shattered against the stone fireplace, John shot to his feet and yelled, "Why the fuck did you do that? I'm not in the mood, Patty."
"The answer to this problem is not in that bottle, mate," Patrick responded, totally unfazed by John's anger. He was not about to sit and watch the man he loved self-medicate. "You're running from your feelings, boyo, and that's not the John I know. Instead of drinking yourself into a stupor, why don't you lie down and rest?"
"No," John said in a sigh as he shook his head. "If kitten should wake up, I want to be the first person she sees. She might be scared, she—"
"Will feel you lying beside her," Patrick replied, cupping the back of John's head. "If you don't sleep, at least take time to clear your head. Give yourself time to process what happened today, mate. I'll sit here and keep my eye on her. If our little kitty cat stirs even the slightest, I'll wake you."
John inhaled deeply as his tired eyes once again traveled to Gillian. He wanted nothing more than to crawl in bed with her and wrap his arms around her. If she was in his bed, then he knew she was safe. Maybe Patrick was right. Drinking wasn't going to help anything. If he lay down beside kitten, maybe he could formulate a plan that would ensure her safety. John already knew his American would resist the rules, but he had to ensure that nothing like today ever happened again. His kitten would learn to obey him just like everyone else. If not, her lovely ass would be punished.