face to face, the draw becoming undeniable as he releases me and scrubs his face with his hand to sit at the edge of my bed. He’s made it impossible for me to sympathize, but I understand his frustration, his fight, the need to believe that we are a cataclysmic mistake. Neither of us is to blame for the attraction we feel. Much like the last year of my life, as cliché as it may be, it just happened.
And we wanted it to happen, but for our own selfish reasons.
But I would be a fool to believe him. He’s done nothing up to this point that rings sincere.
And it’s not my place to comfort him. Because in the wreckage that is Cecelia Horner and Tobias King, we are still reeling, clinging to our purpose as enemies and our loyalty to the people we love. The same two people who can never know we happened, because if those men do care for me, it will cause nothing but destruction.
“You haven’t told them.”
Silence. The battle is clear in his expression, with himself, and the question he can’t bring himself to ask me because he has no right.
But it’s me who says it out loud.
“You don’t want them to know.”
Tobias stays silent for several moments, his reply low. “It would make you an accomplice, not the victim, which you are, and I don’t think I can live with that.”
“I knew exactly what I was doing.”
He jerks his gaze to mine, and I know I’ve probably said too much.
“Well, I didn’t,” he admits in a rare show of vulnerability.
“You didn’t force me. And if this is a secret I decide to keep, make no mistake, it will be my decision. It will be my decision to keep it from them, not yours.” It all boils down to that. The very foundation I’m standing on, the foundation he’s built his life around, secrets and lies and a bond with his brothers that trumps everything else.
Can I keep another secret?
Do I want to?
Do I want to lessen Tobias’s punishment? Do I want to guilt myself anymore for sticking to the principles I’ve been taught by the very man who ripped the safety of them away from me?
Do what you want, when you want, no regrets.
Sean’s words.
I study Tobias trying to weigh if this is just another ploy by him to do his bidding.
“It doesn’t matter,” I say. “Look around. Do you see them here? You’re the one…” I inch away from him, disgusted with myself. “You almost had me.” I shake my head. “You almost had me.” I move to get off my bed, and he stops me with a hand on my thigh. “I’m not buying it,” I declare. He’s just another opportunist taking what he can get from me. His continued presence baffles me, but I’m sure there’s an agenda behind it. There has to be. He’s made it his mission to be the only man in my life purely for spite against his brothers.
He leans in, his knuckles brushing my cheek. “I know what you’re doing, and I don’t blame you.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
He forces my gaze to his, calling my bluff with a single look. But the fact that he knows me well enough to know I’ve checked out, irks me.
But if his confession has any truth to it, then he’s been trying to protect me. That’s why he didn’t tell his brothers. It wasn’t the fact that I was hidden; it was the fact that I was discovered.
The bastard now wants me to believe his black heart was filled with good intentions, despite the way he’s treated me.
“Question everything,” he says softly, reading my thoughts. “I don’t deserve your trust, either.”
“Now, that would be a miracle.”
He exhales, sliding his thumb along my bottom lip. “But you’re right. This is your decision. This card is yours, and it’s your highest one to play. I’ll respect your decision on however and whenever you decide to use it. I won’t fight you on it.”
“Are you forgetting something?”
He draws his brows.
“You’re the great continental divide. They’ve ceased to exist for me, Tobias.” My eyes narrow and I jerk away from his touch. “What are you not telling me?”
“A lot.”
“Get out.”
“I wish it were that simple.”
“It is. You stand, you walk out that door, and you don’t come back. And you cease to exist for me too.”
He leans in, making it impossible for me not to see him. “I wish I could. I