into my eyes and he lowered his voice. "Pick apart the routines. Watch the scores. Watch the skills. Watch every event. Pay close attention to detail, be their biggest critic. Be a heartless judge. Be callous. Be cruel. Find places for improvement. Being nice will get you nowhere. Remember everything, so when you are at practice you avoid making the same mistakes. You will see a lot of the same errors, but if you look closely, you will see even worse ones. These athletes are the best of the best, but even the best make mistakes. It is easier to pick out someone else's faults than your own. Use everything you see today to your advantage. Be greedy." He lowered his voice to just above a whisper, and his eyes turned tender. "Ria, you have a dream. I am trying to make it a reality. Go with it. Please, just trust me on this."
I jerked back and gaped at Kova. He was staring down at me, looking too deeply into my eyes, trying to convey something.
It was in that moment that realization dawned on me. Everything leading up to now, to today, struck me hard, and I wasn't sure how to handle it. I felt Kova's words, his passion, his fire, his desire to give me what I wanted more than anything. He understood it because his own dream became a plan that became a reality. He had someone behind him championing him to the finish line, just like he championed me.
Sometimes the moments in life that caused the most damage to the heart put us on the path of reward and gratification. To the greatest glory. And in that moment, when Kova explained what I needed to do, I felt like everything that happened up until this point, was meant to happen. Where there was perfection, there was pain hidden in darkness. Most days were brutal, and I often questioned my sanity. Others filled with regret, but then something magical happens and everything falls into place. All the heartache and pain once dealt washes away and forgotten when that one moment you've been chasing your whole life is caught and becomes reality.
I didn't give Kova enough credit, and that bothered me. I took him for face value and didn't look beyond the words. I hated to judge a book by its cover, yet here I was constantly judging him. I was ashamed of myself. He may have a cold heart and a black soul, a cruel demeanor as a front, but beyond that was a man who cared what happened to me. He cared about my future and what mattered to me.
"What did that one author say?"
"Huh?" I tilted my head to the side, puzzled by his question. "Which author?"
"The one who invented the Harry Potter? I do not know her name, but in one of her books she wrote, 'Anything is possible if you have got enough nerve.' It is true, and I have never forgotten those words. This—gymnastics—takes courage. It takes heart. And it takes nerve. You got this."
"You read Harry Potter?" I gaped at him.
He cracked a very small smile, one he'd only given me a few times when we were alone, and it seized my heart. His eyes glimmered. A laugh escaped his lips and I felt it down to my bones. "Possibly. Do you understand what I am asking of you now? Why you are here?"
I nodded. "I do now. Thank you." My eyes softened.
"I want only the best for you. You come out on top, we both come out on top."
"Sometimes you can be so nice, you know."
He chuckled. "Do not tell anyone. You will ruin my cover."
I swallowed back the knot in my throat and tried not to smile from ear to ear. My heart was so full I thought it was going to combust. When he removed some of his layers and gave me a real glimpse of the man he was, I had an overwhelming urge to be closer to him. He was more laid back, casual, confident. Even flirtatious. He was rarely like that with me. If hundreds of people did not surround us, I would've thrown my arms around his shoulders and hugged the shit out of him.
"I don't want to distract you. Do you want me to wait outside until practice is over?" I felt like I had asked this five times already.
"I want you with me." His voice was raspy, barely above a whisper.