down to stop myself from saying something I'd only regret.
"I'll talk to you later, Avery."
Fifty-Six
"I think you should talk to her, Xavier. She looks really bad," I said stiffly, stuffing my clothes into my bag.
Thankfully I hadn't brought too many things home. I wanted to leave as fast as possible.
When he was silent for too long, I looked up and our eyes locked. I let him see the full fury of hurt I felt from the knife they stabbed into my back. He shook his head, the hard stare in his eyes said he was standing his ground. "No. She did it to herself. She brought this upon us."
I scoffed in disbelief. I could hardly look at him, I wasn't sure I even wanted to talk to him.
"Us… I can't believe you two. Honestly, Xavier, I have nothing to say to you right now, that's how angry I am."
"And yet you are because I'm your brother."
Brother. I turned away. The word blurred my vision and my jaw trembled. I inhaled and swallowed back my stupid emotions. "And Avery is like my sister. What's your point?" I hastily grabbed a shirt and slammed it into my bag. "All the lies. So many lies. I'm so sick of being lied to."
"Aid," Xavier said gently as he walked over to me. He placed his hand on my forearm and I quickly yanked it back. We stood next to each other in silence for a long moment. I could tell he was waiting for me to look at him before he spoke, but I didn't. I was so furious with him, I was worried I'd say something I would later regret.
Angling his head down near mine, he asked, "If you're so concerned about her, you talk to her."
I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to block out the image of how I left her. So broken and distraught. I should have spoken to her, and for a second, I wished I had, but I just couldn't. My heart hurt because of that.
I shook my head. "I can't. You don't understand. There are things you don't know between me and Ave. I confided in her. She should've done the same with me. Especially since it was you." I paused and clenched my teeth, then said, "God, Xavier. Why did you have to go after her? Of all girls, you pick my best friend?" My emotions were climbing again and this time my sadness swirled into a simmering rage.
Xavier stepped back until he was leaning against my dresser. "Did she tell you what happened?"
"No," I said softly as I stared at my rumpled clothes. I was trying to calm myself down and not lash out, but the weight of their deceitful lies was getting to me. "She tried to, but I wouldn't let her. I'm too hurt over everything to talk to her, because no matter what she says, it wouldn't make a difference right now. Same goes for you."
"I understand. You did get blasted with a bunch of dirty secrets. It's a lot to take in."
"You could say that again."
"Let me ask you something."
I growled under my breath. "I really wish you would just leave me alone. In case you didn't notice, I'm as mad at you as I am Avery."
Naturally, Xavier ignored my plea. "If Avery had told you, had the courage to say that she was in a relationship with your brother, what would you have said?" His voice turned hard, almost defensive. "Would you have been okay with it? Truly be okay?"
I stared at my scattered belongings I had thrown across my bed in my haste to leave, and contemplated his question. "Honesty, Aid," he pushed, his voice deepening with anger. "Look at me and tell me that you'd be straight with me banging your best friend." The hairs on my arms stood up. My fingers tightened around the shorts I had clutched in my hand until my knuckles turned white. His words got under my skin and were meant to provoke me, but I forced myself to stay silent. "That's what I thought."
I swallowed and finished up packing.
"For what it's worth, I really did love her."
Love! My head finally snapped toward him. "Love who?"
Xavier gave me a lopsided grin. "Avery. I cared about her a lot, way more than I ever thought I would, but after what happened"—he dropped his sad gaze to the floor and shook his head—"there's no going back. She completely dissolved anything we had. She ruined it."