to get him to express himself, to help me understand why he did what he did if I was truly ready like he claimed I was.
I continued my roaming until I'd touched the small of his back, and moved upward toward the center where his muscles flexed beneath my palms. I sat up and brought my chest to his, pressing myself to him. Kova angled his face down as his breath mingled with mine, our lips mere inches from touching. My stomach fluttered and I dragged my legs up the back of his thighs and wrapped them around his hips. Kova straightened and I removed my arms from beneath his shirt, coiling them instead around his broad shoulders. I scooted closer and my fingers threaded in his hair. All the while he hadn't laid a finger on me.
"I hate you and want you at the same time." The confession rolled off my tongue before I could stop it.
"I know you do," he breathed into me. "Listen, I cannot make you any promises, but I will try to be better. I am only human, and I wrongfully acted out. And contrary to what it may seem, I never want to see you hurting like today. Your first meet to test elite is a big one and I want you prepared."
I stole a quick glance at his lips, a fraction away now, and mine trembled with the urge to close the distance. Heart racing, blood on fire, I was desperate for the next move. His hands found my waist and settled there, giving me a squeeze. A spark of energy passed through us and zipped up my spine. He exhaled as I inhaled, and I drew in a lungful of his breath. Kova ran his tongue along his bottom lip and a smile curved at the corner. I melted into him. Goose bumps peppered my arms as he angled his mouth toward mine.
He was going to kiss me. And damn it all to hell, I wanted him to.
But I wouldn't let him.
Just as he was about to press his lips to mine, I moved my hand over his heart and stopped him. He looked at me. In another place, in another time, things would be different. I'd let him kiss me, let him have me however he wanted. But right now, I couldn't, and I wasn't sure when I'd let him ever again.
"Your heart is beating so fast," I whispered.
His pulse thumped beneath my fingertips. His eyes were the darkest green color I'd ever seen. They captivated me, hypnotized me. He leaned in closer.
"No," I begged, my voice ragged and tortured as I pressed on his chest to push him back. "Please don't kiss me."
Kova cupped the side of my neck, pressing his thumb under the edge of my jaw, and with a gentle ease, he tilted my head back to grant him control. He dominated the air between us…and me.
"Do not deny me."
"You told me to deny you."
"I lied," he growled.
His thumb stroked my throat while I swallowed. There was something intimate about it and I found myself arching into him. I couldn't tear my eyes from his hooded ones.
"Give me what I want." His lips brushed against mine.
"No." My voice cracked.
"Yes," he demanded against my mouth. Kova's warm tongue slipped ever so slowly along the seam of my lips, coaxing me. He held the back of my neck firmly until I surrendered to him, allowing him access. He licked the roof of my mouth, dragging his tongue seductively along the top, then pulled my lip between his teeth. A throbbing in my sex shot through me and I gasped.
"This is what you do to me." He licked me again. I had no control over my body when he was like this. "Every time I am near you, every time I think about you, I feel this way, malysh. You have awakened a beast inside me."
I returned his kiss, plunging my tongue into his mouth, and hating myself for caving in. He sucked it, stroked it. I wrapped both my arms around his neck and he pulled me closer. I whimpered, craving more. My inner thighs squeezed around his hips as I surged up, angling myself right where I needed him. My clit throbbed as I rubbed against his erection. Kova placed a hand on my knee, and then dragged it up the side of my thigh and clutched me at my hip.