open. Finn sounded so sad and I just wanted to comfort him. My fingers finally began to comply. I wiggled them, and he must have felt it.
“Em? Em honey, can you hear me?”
I made a slight groaning sound in the back of my throat. Forcing my lids open just a bit and blinking hard, they gradually allowed me to start opening them. Through half-closed eyes I was able to glance around the room. I saw stark white walls in front of me, and a TV hanging near the ceiling. Moving my head in the direction of the hand Finn was holding, I saw him. He looked at me expectantly. His eyes were red and puffy, as if he’d been crying.
“Oh thank god! You’re awake. Jesus Em, I’m so glad you are okay.”
He was speaking so fast. Or was I just that tired?
“Where am I?” My voice was hoarse.
“Are you thirsty? I can get you some water.” He stood up and moved to a rolling tray that had a pitcher and a glass next to it.
I nodded my head. My throat was very dry.
He came back to the bed and gave me the glass. I brought it to my lips and drank. The water was cold and stung the back of my throat, but after the initial shock subsided it felt good. I drank the whole glass down. He took it from me when I was done and sat down next to me. He took my hand again. I felt something on my finger. Looking at it, it was one of those pulse things they put on you in the hospital. What in the hell?
“Finn, where am I?”
“You’re in the hospital Em. Do you remember anything?”
“Hospital?” I tried to wrack my brain. “How did I get in the hospital?”
“Something’s happened Tiny Girl.” He shifted in his seat. “Damn it, I don’t even know how to tell you this.”
My heart kicked into high gear. “What the hell is going on Finley?” When I started to move a sharp pain hit me in my lower stomach and I winced.
“Please don’t move to much Em, you’ll hurt yourself.”
That’s when all of the memories began flooding through me. Furniture shopping, feeling content and happy, the sandwich shop, Val showing up… oh no! I flung the covers off the lower half of my body.
Flat. My stomach was flat.
My eyes were huge and I looked at Finn. “Why is my stomach flat? Where’s my baby?”
He didn’t say anything. He just sat there unable to tell me what I knew in my heart had happened.
Tears flowed down my face. “What happened to my baby Finley?”
He cleared his throat.
I felt my anger rising because he hadn’t responded, so I took a deep breath and calmed myself. Looking him straight in his deep blue eyes I used a tone that he couldn’t ignore.
“What the hell are you not telling me? I want to know where my baby is, and I swear to god, if you don’t tell me right now I’m going to call someone in here that can.”
“Stay calm honey, concentrate on your breathing… in and out… you’re okay… it’s all going to be okay.” He scooted his chair closer. “When you left the sandwich shop you went down the road. By the time I caught up with you, you were already bleeding and had fallen to the ground. I caught you just before your head hit the sidewalk.” He took a deep shaky breath. “And… oh god Em, I tried to get you here as fast as I possibly could. I really did. I didn’t know what was happening. You were passed out and there was so much blood everywhere! I thought I was going to lose you.”
“Something has happened to my baby, hasn’t it?”
He nodded. A strangled noise came from my mouth.
“Dr. Monroe was here with you. He came and told us that you lost it. I’m so sorry Em. The baby’s gone. He said that he was able to fix everything and you’ll still be able to have children. I know that doesn’t make this better, but he wanted you to know.”
There was no conceivable way to wrap my mind around it. This couldn’t be happening. I wasn’t pregnant?
“How?”
“It was something called a placental abruption. The placenta tore away from where it was attached. They tried to save the baby, but you were still too early and the baby was underdeveloped.”