The Endgame Is You (Rixon Raiders #4) - L A Cotton Page 0,36
We see it all the time in class. That shared experience can become a dependency... a crutch. But unless you give yourself time and space to come to terms with that trauma, you can’t really know who you are or what you want.”
Faith had a point. We’d studied enough about attachment, shared trauma, and trauma bonding for me to know that people often did mistake shared trauma for compatibility. But what me and Asher had wasn’t some product of our experiences.
When my ex, Jermaine, had found me in Rixon and shot Asher’s mom, part of me had felt sure Asher would never be able to forgive me. At the time, I hadn’t been sure I would ever forgive myself. But Asher loved me in spite of that. He’d done nothing but prove to me he was in.
All in.
When I didn’t answer, Faith let out an exasperated breath. “Look, all I’m saying is, we’re halfway into college. Do you really want to spend your entire college experience tied to another person who may or may not end up being the one? Because I sure as hell don’t.”
I pressed my lips together, considering her words. Asher had gone against his father’s plans for him and followed me to Temple University.
He put me first every single time.
Above the team. Above his family and friends.
Faith was wrong. I didn’t need to spend the next two years questioning anything. Because I knew. In my heart of hearts, I knew how Asher felt about me. And I knew how I felt about him.
“You’re wrong,” I said, standing.
“Seriously? You’re going after him?” Faith gawked at me, while Bella gave me a discreet thumbs up.
“I get Max wasn’t it for you, but Asher is it for me. You’re one of my best friends and I’ll always be here for you... but don’t project your shit onto me, okay?”
Faith smothered a gasp and I offered her a weak smile. “I’ll see you in class.”
I didn’t wait around to hear her reply. I had to go after my guy.
Asher
“Yo, man. We weren’t expecting you.” Diego swaggered over to me. He had an Owls ball cap pulled on backwards and his jeans slung low on his hips.
“Do you ever wear a shirt?” I asked, meeting his fist bump with my own.
“And deny the ladies all this?” He swept a hand down his cut abs. “Nah, bro. So, what’s up? I thought you and Mya had plans?”
“We did.” I pressed my lips together, smothering a groan.
“Oh shit, trouble in paradise?”
“Honestly, I don’t know what the fuck happened. One minute, everything was fine, the next...”
“You need a drink. Yo, Broderick,” he hollered over his shoulder. “Get my guy, Asher, a beer.”
Ten seconds later, Broderick appeared. “Hey, man.”
“What’s up?” I gave him a small nod.
“Not a lot. Just shooting some pool and deciding who to take for a ride tonight.” He smirked, and the two of them high-fived, laughing and jostling each other.
“Ash and Mya had a fight,” Diego said.
“Oh shit. You need me to hook you up? Jada is here and she brought plenty of friends.”
“I’m good, thanks.” Jada was a cheerleader and more than happy to service the football team.
“You need to relax, man,” he said. “Have a drink. Get your dick suck—”
“Do not finish that sentence,” a familiar voice said, and Diego let out a low whistle.
“Mya?” I turned to meet her narrowed gaze. “What are you—”
“Can we talk?” Her brow went up.
“We’ll give the two of you some space.” Diego dragged Broderick away.
“You left,” she said.
“I didn’t think I was welcome there.” I rubbed my bottom lip, hating the distance between us.
If Cameron and Jason were here, I knew they would tell me to grow some balls. But I’d always worn my heart on my sleeve, I wasn’t about to change now.
“Ash.” She inched closer, so close I could smell her perfume. “What has gotten into you?”
I reached for her, but Mya batted my hand away, pressing her palms flat against my chest and pushing me into the wall.
“You knew what you were signing on for with me,” I said. “I’m intense and needy and so fucking gone for you.”
“Faith said some things...” Her eyes glittered with emotion. “But she doesn’t get it. No one does. The way I feel about you. The way you make me feel...” Mya leaned in, letting her mouth hover over mine. “You’re it for me, Asher Bennet.”
“Yeah?” My throat felt dry, my heart beating hard beneath my ribcage.