the shelf that held two boxes of childhood mementos. I’d barely registered what had happened before someone was pounding on my door. After the interruption from Holden that I couldn’t quite decipher—if it was sweet or rude—I was in no mood to tackle the closet.
“Ugh!” I grunted as I stuffed it all back in, and then had to put my shoulder into it to get it to close.
Channing stared up at me with mild disdain. Or maybe that was just me anthropomorphizing him.
“You could help. You weigh almost as much as me.”
The flaps of his jowls puffed out as he sighed. No, he was definitely not impressed with my behavior.
I finally got it to shut and I leaned against my victory door. I was panting and had probably expended more energy than it would’ve taken just to clean the damn thing out. But mentally I was not in the mood.
I was…amped. I was fired up. Holden’s “apology” had only left me with more questions.
They all circled my head as I stomped upstairs to take a bath. I’d soak in a bath and try to calm down. I turned the water on and let it run until I felt like it was the right temperature. I lit some candles around the room, trying to create a calm atmosphere.
I’d already had two drinks, which would normally be my limit, but I decided that I wanted something to take the edge off. I went downstairs into the kitchen and pulled out a half-drank bottle of pinot from the fridge. Jackpot!
After pouring the contents into a tumbler wine glass I went right back up the stairs and got naked. I took a significant swig of the wine as Channing pushed his nose in the door that was cracked open, circled three times on the mat that sat in the center of the room, and curled up in a ball.
As I sat on the edge of the bathtub waiting for the water to rise, I imitated Holden’s deep voice as I said, “You’re way to perfect in an infinite amount of ways?” I looked over at Channing. “How was that a reason not to kiss me?”
His eyes were already closed, and a faint snore floated through the air. Apparently, my crisis was boring him.
Once the tub was filled to the spill line, I shut the water off and slid into the bath. I rested my head back against a rolled-up towel and did my best to clear my mind. I tried to think about anything other than Holden. But the more I tried not to think about him, the more I did.
Why had he stayed at the bar after my brother and Travis had gone home?
Was that on the orders of Bentley?
Why had he asked me to dance?
Why did he have so many opinions about my date?
And why did he keep giving me such personal compliments and then leaving?
My hands floated on the surface of the water, as I moved my fingers, I watched the ripples it created. That was what I’d felt Holden had done to my soul. His words had caused ripples in my very being.
I’d never really put that much stock in flattery about my appearance. Someone telling me that I had a beautiful smile, pretty eyes, or gorgeous hair had never felt personal to me. Maybe it was because I was a twin; I’d been born with a carbon copy. Or maybe it was because I’d grown up witnessing my oldest brother Brady compliment anything with a pulse just to get what he wanted. I remember one night I’d overheard him tell three different girls that their eyes sparkled brighter than the stars in the sky. And all three girls had fallen for it.
Whatever the reason, any comments about my appearance, no matter how positive, had always felt impersonal to me. But Holden telling me that I was magic…and way too perfect in an infinite amount of ways…that felt very, very personal. It was a little unnerving and a lot frustrating.
I couldn’t say for sure how much time I’d spent in the bath trying to relax and clear my mind, but when the water lost its heat and became room temperature, I decided to get out. After quickly drying off and throwing my flannel PJs, shorts and T-shirt back on, I decided that there was no way I was going to be able to sleep tonight without some answers.
I grabbed my slippers out of the closet and started downstairs. I was