Dreaming of His Pen Pal's Kiss - Jessie Gussman Page 0,2
breath of the saints who made up the church.
It was just a building, but it always felt alive to her. Always gave her peace. Comfort. And hope.
Finally, Race shifted and swallowed. “No. I actually know this is something you should do.” Concern overshadowed every other emotion on his face. “I want to protect you. I know your heart was already broken, and love can be hard sometimes. Not that I’m expecting you to fall in love with this person.”
He tapped the paper on the desk. “Not romantic love. But even friends can break your heart. I just can’t help but think that even though I know this is what you’re supposed to do, there’s going to be tears ahead. As a father, I don’t want that. Still, I know that sometimes it’s the hard times in our life where we grow the most. It’s what God uses to bring us closer to Him and to make us into the people that he wants us to be. I can definitely look back over my own life and see that as a stark reality. The hardest times of my life ended up being the best times for me. It’s just...they’re so hard to walk through. But I think even more than that, it’s hard to watch people we love walk through them. If you love someone, their pain is yours. So, if I’m hesitating, maybe it’s about my own heart as much as it’s about yours.”
Journee smiled at that. Her dad wasn’t more concerned about himself than her, but he was also a humble man, and he wouldn’t boast. “I love that you care about me. And I know I am a dreamer. I know I have a tendency to make really bad decisions, but I think I’m doing better, and I’m also stronger than what I get credit for. I might be the youngest, but I am grown up.”
She didn’t really mind the tendency of everyone in her family to treat her like she was still a child. In some ways, she kinda felt like she was.
She had made some foolish choices. Although, at least for the way some people thought, she’d made a wise decision in completing her four-year nursing degree, but she’d passed up a lot more lucrative opportunities in order to come back to her hometown and settle down. She had no desire to leave her family and friends in the town she grew up in.
None.
“I know you do.”
At that, Race pushed back away from the desk and came around. Journee stood, and he embraced her, the strength of his arms and the scent of his aftershave familiar and beloved, comforting, making her feel safe like she always did when Race hugged her. She knew he’d protect her with everything he had, but she also knew she was an adult and had to be responsible for her own decisions and her own life.
He squeezed her for a bit and pulled away first. “Here’s the address. It’s a man. He’s not retired. And, like all of the other pen pal recipients in our program, he’s in the hospital. He hasn’t been in quite as long as most of the others, only a couple of weeks, but because of the nature of his job, people who care about him know that being in the hospital is psychologically excruciating for him. They felt that giving him a pen pal—someone like you,” Race said with a smile, “is what he needs to get himself back to where he needs to be in order to do his job to the best of his ability.”
“Are you saying he’s depressed?” She tilted her head, having had some experience with depression in her schooling. Also, Alex had been going to be a psychologist.
“I don’t think he’s there. Yet. I do think it’s a distinct possibility, especially if he doesn’t get better.” Race’s words were slightly hesitant, like he didn’t want to say too much.
Journee nodded. She didn’t need to know all the details. She had a good imagination, and she could fill them in with whatever she wanted. She could have a conversation with herself. Or with a reluctant man who needed to be encouraged. Of course, she had been worried she came on too strong with her other pen pals. Maybe she should start slowly.
“I’ll do my best, Dad.”
“I knew you would, Journee. I love you.” He squeezed her again before letting go.
She fingered the paper as she walked out of his office. Somehow, the