it other than a giant word, slashed into empty space. Twelve strokes hung in the air, a great pictogram the shimmering hue of green-blue snakeskin, glinting in the unnatural brightness like freshly spilled blood.
“That’s impossible,” Chaghan said. “She shouldn’t be able to do this.”
The pictogram looked both entirely familiar and entirely foreign. Rin couldn’t read it, though it had to be written in the Nikara script. It came close to resembling several characters she knew but deviated from all of them in significant ways.
This was something ancient, then. Something old; something that predated the Red Emperor. “What is this?”
“What does it look like?” Chaghan reached out an incorporeal hand as if to touch it, then hastily drew it back. “This is a Seal.”
A Seal? The term sounded oddly familiar. Rin remembered fragments of a battle. A white-haired man floating in the air, lightning swirling around the tip of his staff, opening a void to a realm of things not mortal, things that didn’t belong in their world.
You’re Sealed.
Not anymore.
“Like the Gatekeeper?” she asked.
“The Gatekeeper was Sealed?” Chaghan sounded astonished. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I had no idea!”
“But that would explain so much! That’s why he’s been lost, why he doesn’t remember—”
“What are you talking about?”
“The Seal blocks your access to the world of spirit,” Chaghan explained. “The Vipress left her venom inside you. That’s what it’s made of. It will keep you from accessing the Pantheon. And over time it will grow stronger and stronger, eating away at your mind until you lose even your memories associated with the Phoenix. It’ll make you a shell of yourself.”
“Please tell me you can get rid of it.”
“I can try. You’ll have to take me inside.”
“Inside?”
“The Seal is also a gateway. Look.” Chaghan pointed into the heart of the character, where the glimmering snake blood formed a swirling circle. When Rin focused on it, it did indeed seem to call to her, drawing her into some unknown dimension beyond. “Go inside. I’m betting that’s where Daji’s left the venom. It exists here in the form of memory. Daji’s power dwells in desire; she’s conjured the things that you want the most to prevent you from calling the fire.”
“Venom. Memory. Desire.” Very little of this was making sense to Rin. “Look—just tell me whatever the fuck I’m supposed to do with it.”
“You destroy it however you can.”
“Destroy what?”
“I think you’ll know when you see it.”
Rin didn’t have to ask how to pass the gate. It pulled her in as soon as she approached it. The Seal seemed to fold in over them, growing larger and larger until it enveloped them. Swirls of blood drifted around her, undulating, as if trying to decide what shape to take, what illusion to create.
“She’ll show you the future you want,” Chaghan said.
But Rin didn’t see how that could possibly work for her, because her greatest desires didn’t exist in the future. They were all in the past. She wanted the last five years back. She wanted lazy days on the Academy campus. She wanted lackadaisical strolls in Jiang’s garden, she wanted summer vacations at Kitay’s estate, she wanted, she wanted . . .
She was on the sands of the Isle of Speer again—vibrant, beautiful Speer, lush and vivid like she had never seen it before. And there Altan was, healthy and whole, smiling like she had never really seen him smile.
“Hello,” he said. “Are you ready to come home?”
“Kill him,” Chaghan said urgently.
But hadn’t she already? At Khurdalain she’d fought a beast with Altan’s face, and she’d killed him then. Then at the research facility she’d let him walk out on the pier, let him sacrifice himself to save her.
She’d already killed Altan, over and over, and he kept coming back.
How could she harm him now? He looked so happy. So free from pain. She knew so much more about him now, she knew what he had suffered, and she couldn’t touch him. Not like this.
Altan drew closer. “What are you doing out here? Come with me.”
She wanted to go with him more than anything. She didn’t even know where he would take her, only that he would be there. Oblivion. Some dark paradise.
Altan extended his hand toward her. “Come.”
She steeled herself. “Stop this,” she managed. “Chaghan, I can’t—stop it—take me back—”
“Surely you’re joking,” Chaghan said. “You can’t even do this?”
Altan took her fingers in his. “Let’s go.”
“Stop it!”
She wasn’t sure what she did but she felt a burst of energy, saw the Seal contort and writhe around