than usual town gossip, I mean.” She cleared her throat, removing her arms from Lilac to wipe her own tears. Sable wrapped both her arms around herself. Even if she’d suspected Freya’s death, the confirmation of such clearly took its toll.
The responsibility of that night had always weighed in on Lilac, but not nearly as much as it must’ve for her grieving mother. Guilt bubbled up from her burning gut.
“It was my fault,” Lilac blurted in a soft half sob. “That night it happened, I went down to the kitchen to get a drink from my father’s stash. That’s where I found her. She was a wolf then. We were both shocked when we discovered that we were able to converse with each other. Someone overheard us, and that’s how we were caught.” She wiped the corners of her eyes with her dress sleeve and spoke to Sable’s feet, unable to meet her gaze. “All she wanted was food for her young. Maybe if I hadn’t gone downstairs, hadn’t spoken with her, she would’ve remained undetected. I tried to help her, Sable. I’m sorry.”
With a sad smile, Sable pivoted to face the hearth, still clutching her arms tightly around her chest. “That is where you are wrong, Your Highness. You are not to blame. The fault is all mine.”
“Please, Sable.” Why would she shoulder the blame? “Please don’t say that. I owe you my apologies, and so much more.”
The woman stared on and continued as if Lilac hadn’t spoken. “You don’t understand. See, the only reason she went to forage at your castle in the first place, was because I turned her down.”
“What are you talking about?”
“That morning, t-the morning of your birthday, she arrived on my doorstep. It was the first time I’d seen my daughter since relinquishing her, but I immediately knew who she was, the woman on our porch. You’d know your own daughter. She had the same frizzed hair as Luzio. Strawberry hair like mine. Her eyes were desperate. Ravenous. They were a wolf’s eyes.”
Sable shuddered. “I wouldn’t let her in. Jeanare was home at the time, and I was much too ashamed. I didn’t want him to see. From our doorstep, Freya told me she’d lost her seamstress position up in Rennes when the townsfolk became suspicious of her; she was able to keep her Darkling nature hidden for a number of years, but folks began to talk after realizing her consistent absences on days after the full moon. Once the rumors spread, she had to leave and couldn’t return to the city. She and her two young boys—my grandchildren I didn’t know existed ‘til then—were forced to flee into the forest to escape the possibility of execution.”
The woman’s gaze was hollow; no matter how badly she wanted to, the princess couldn’t stand to look away.
“All she wanted were rations for her young… My own grandbabies. And I turned her away before my husband could hear the commotion.”
“So, she came to the castle.” Lilac’s tongue stuck to the roof of her mouth, her throat suddenly dry. The picture of solemn desperation—the enormous pride Freya had swallowed to ask for help—burned in her own memories surfacing now. Her birthday had always been announced by town crier. Freya probably knew there’d be copious leftovers after the soirée. Suddenly, she felt sick.
“Yes. Your Highness, I thought she might go to the kingdom to appeal to the king. I didn’t know she had it in her to try and steal, straight from the castle.”
“He doesn’t know, does he? Your husband, I mean.” Lilac rocked on her heels. Hearing Freya’s backstory and meeting her mother, both were equally intriguing and painful.
Sable shut her eyes briefly. Almost pleadingly. “Nor shall he ever. He knows about Luzio, but nothing of the child we’d conceived. I couldn’t do that to him after sparing him the truth after all these years. Plus, Jeanare and I could never have any of our own.”
Swallowing hard, the princess looked down at her hands; her nail beds were red from her picking at them. “What became of her sons?”
“All these years and I haven’t been able to locate them. I fear the worst.”
“I’m sure they’re alive, Sable.” Lilac tried to sound reassuring but bit her lip before speaking further; she had no inkling if they were alive or not, and Sable didn’t seem the type to entertain false hope. “Children are resilient,” said the princess resolutely. “They have the strongest will of all.”