Diamonds Are Forever - Brooke St. James Page 0,35

out and you could come see Mac and everything."

"Stop trying to break up with me," he said. He reached out and pulled me close, and I stared up at him.

"I can't break up with you when we're not together," I said. I was being playful, but I regretted it the second it came out of my mouth.

"We will be in three weeks," he said.

"I thought we said a month."

"You said a month or three weeks," he said. "Look, Lu, I'll do your challenge if it makes you feel better. I'll wait a few weeks to prove to you that I'm not going to change my mind. But what do I have to do then? Do I just show up on your doorstep when the time is up?"

I hesitated, opening my mouth and then closing it again before deciding what to say. "Yes, Drew, please, by all means. If you wait a few weeks, and you still think it's a good idea to try to be more than friends with a woman who has a child, please come back. But also know that I won't be mad at you if you don't."

Chapter 13

A month later

As the weeks passed, I realized I had been stubborn and ruined whatever I had with Drew. I knew it was a risky move when I told him to leave me alone, but I had no idea I'd be so mad at myself when he failed the challenge.

I should have just gone with it and gotten to know him when he was ready and willing to get to know me. But no, I had to go and try to put him to some kind of test. And enough time had passed by now that it seemed as though we had failed.

If I had to guess at why I did this to myself, I'd say I had some fear about getting close to people after what happened to me with my parents and then with Bradley. I thought about Drew a lot, though, and regretted not taking a chance with him.

I never mentioned him to anyone. My family must've assumed it had been his decision to stop coming around, because no one asked me about him either. My mom would have analyzed me if I would have told her about it. She would have figured out that I pushed him away and she would have encouraged me to either go get him or fight against that urge next time. I didn't really want to talk about it. My family just sort of got the picture that he wasn't coming around, and they didn't know if it was a sore subject for me, so they didn't bring it up.

Mac did ask about Drew several times. I told him Drew lived in Houston, and I said that I thought we would probably see him again sometime. I acted really upbeat and happy about it in front of Mac even though I was mad at myself.

I told myself I had gotten what I wanted. Obviously, Drew thought about it and figured out that his life was better off without us. In all honesty, it would have been a difficult transition for any man to make. In one way, I had accomplished my goal. We realized that Drew wanted other things before I was able to get hurt. But in the end, it hurt anyway, so I guess I was sad that I had given up so easily—mad at myself for that.

Drew did make good on his promise to help me find a publisher. His dad was friends with one of the coaches of the Houston Astros, and he knew a player on the team with an agent who also had a few literary clients.

My parents knew I had a publishing deal in the works, and they knew that the introduction came by way of Drew, but even still, they didn't ask me about him. I thought maybe they assumed he broke my heart. Maybe they weren't that far off.

Either way, I got an agent out of the deal. I had a meeting with him where I brought my work along with some of the illustrations from the artist I had hired. I signed a contract with him on the spot. I had gone to the meeting alone, but the terms of the contract were simple, and I didn't hesitate to sign it.

My agent's name was Jim Lewis, and I was so excited about working with him and seeing where all this