Devils' Day Party: A High School Bully Romance - C.M. Stunich Page 0,35

know how to respond to her question, so I don’t. Instead, I glance over at the imposing form of Crescent Preparatory Academy and wonder if this where I have to spend the rest of eternity, in this big stupid Tudor building with a bunch of rich rejects that I hate, but only because they hate me. I never wanted that. When I started here in freshman year, I thought I could change their minds, show them that their wealth and privilege didn’t make them any better than me.

I’ve completely and utterly failed to do anything of the sort. I’m not some kind of folk hero. Instead, I’m just a girl living a nightmare and wishing it would end.

“April is right,” Luke says, squeezing the pack of powdered donuts in her hand enough that they’re probably ruined. “You’re pale. I mean, you’re white as fuck, so you’re always pale, but … this isn’t a normal sort of paleness. You’re ashen, Karma.”

I stare at her and before I realize it, the tears are coming, hot and salty as they run down my cheeks.

“Oh, Karma,” she says, exchanging a quick look with April before she pulls me into her arms and squeezes me so tightly that I can’t breathe. I think about her talking to my moms about Calix, spilling my secrets without telling me about it. But it’s impossible to be mad about something that might never have happened. “What’s wrong?” Luke leans back, looking at me with her dark brown eyes, her anime-blue hair wafting gently in the breeze. “You still love him, don’t you?”

“I never loved him,” I snap back, but it feels like a lie, even though it’s not. I never loved Calix. I … I don’t know why I gave into him last year, but it wasn’t because of that. Maybe I just wanted to try the whole sex thing, so I could stop wondering about it? He was good, too—probably a byproduct of all his whoring around—so at least there’s that. We did it; it felt good. End of story. You’re such a liar, even to yourself. “Look, I’m just having a shitty day, okay? I don’t want to talk about Calix or the Knight Crew or anything else.”

“Yeah, yeah, of course, no worries,” Luke says, pulling the goblin mask from her book bag. It makes me feel sick, watching her put it on. No matter how I deviate from the formula, the universe steers me right back in the same direction.

“God, this town is weird,” April murmurs, and I decide I just can’t take it anymore. I thought I could force myself to follow the original day step by step, but I can’t. I can’t stand how surreal it feels, how wrong it feels. My mouth burns with the taste of copper, and I turn away, storming into the woods and away from the school as April and Luke call out after me.

Then I start to run, and I don’t stop until I’m climbing inside my car and peeling out of the parking lot.

I head back to my parents’ house, parking outside the Diamond Point gates and then sneaking inside on foot. Once I’m sure that both of my moms are in their art studio out back, I let myself into the house with my key and load up as much weed and alcohol as I can find. Neither of my parents is much into substances of any kind, so there’s not a lot, but I do find a small container of pot brownies on the top shelf of their bedroom bookcase, and a case of wine that Mama Cathy bought for her book club meeting. There’s even a full bottle of tequila that some acquaintance of theirs gifted them for Christmas last year and they never drank; it still has a red and green ribbon tied around the neck.

After that, I head for the woods where the party’s being held later, intent on staking my claim in one of the train cars and getting wasted. I’m not sure why that’s the first plan that comes to mind. There are so many other things I could be doing right now, but I feel paralyzed. Helpless. At least the alcohol and the weed, they can take the pain away.

When I finally get to the train car, however, I find that someone’s already beaten me there.

It’s Pearl, sitting on one of the seats with her knee propped up, a small razor blade in her hand. One by one,