Devil Incarnate (Boys of Preston Prep #4) - Angel Lawson Page 0,186

car before, too. But the admission still hangs heavy in the air, a pointed acknowledgement that Heston and I have been together outside of academic obligations.

When we reach the abandoned parking lot, Heston rolls his eyes. “This is the elusive ‘secret’ society that’s been working under Collins’ nose for a year?” Flinging a hand toward the scene, he adds, “Gee, I sure hope no one notices the twelve cars hanging around an empty parking lot.”

“You could always make it eleven by fucking off,” Bass says, wrenching the back door open with an awful creak.

I don’t follow him as he crosses the parking lot to where Sugar waits in her Mustang. Even in the dark, I can sense the moment she realizes I’m in the car with Heston. I’m sure Bass will give her all the sordid details and I’ll have even more explaining to do.

Just not tonight.

The car is warm and my legs are Jell-O. Plus, I don’t feel up to the conversations I know my friends are itching to have. I can see Vandy perched on the hood of Reynolds Jeep, sipping from a coffee, and her eyes are trained right at us.

“Are you okay?” Heston’s voice is quiet, uncertain in a way I’m not used to hearing from him.

“Just tired, I think.” Turning to him, I give a small smile. “You?”

“Fucking wiped,” he admits, tipping his head back against the seat. “I haven’t gone that hard since I swam against Hamilton freshman year.”

I watch his hooded eyes as he stares out at the parking lot. “You’re always saving me from drowning.”

“Not always.” He lolls his head against the seat to meet my gaze, eyes full of a dark weight that makes my chest twinge. “Sometimes I’m the one pushing you under.”

“Sometimes,” I agree, reaching for the hand he has resting on the steering wheel. “But I believe you don’t want to be.”

He looks down at our hands, watching as his thumb makes a slow, gentle circuit against my skin. “Georgia, there’s something I need to tell you.” Everything slows down as I wait, fearing the worst. Another video. Another bet. Instead, he says, “I got a call yesterday from the investigators. They ruled the fire an accident. Electrical.”

I release the breath I’ve been holding, giving his hand a squeeze. “That’s good, right?”

“Yeah, it’s just...” He looks at me, mouth tilting into an unhappy line. “The club was insured.”

I blink at him. “Oh.”

“I didn’t want you to think that’s why I did it. Insurance money never even crossed my mind, and I wasn’t—”

“I get it.” I squeeze his hand again, offering a grin. “That’ll help you, right?”

“I don’t know.” He shakes his head, looking out the windshield. In the distance, Micha, Elena, and Afton are performing one of the dance squad’s old moves. “Honestly, I’m not sure having money is very good for me right now.”

“Because of the gambling?” I ask, forehead creasing with a frown. “Is it…hard?” Aside from a couple throwaway comments, Heston’s never really talked about it much. I’d always gotten the sense that it wasn’t something he took very seriously.

Now, however, he looks anything but flippant. “It can be.” Beneath the weariness in his eyes, there’s the ghost of something frustrated and pained. “Sometimes, something just seems like the best idea. Like you’ve got it all figured out, because…”

“Because you’ve rationalized it,” I guess, giving a wry laugh. “I happen to know a thing or two about that.”

“That’s why I needed you to know.” He turns to me, gaze turning to steel. “I might fuck up, because I think…whatever this is—addiction, impulse, whatever—maybe it’s not an easy thing to kick. Maybe I’m not strong enough. Maybe it’s just a part of who I am.” Before I can argue, he pins me under his gaze. “But I swear to fucking god, I’ll lose everything before I make you a part of that again.”

I swallow thickly, stomach flipping. “Heston…”

“I’m not asking you to trust me,” he says, cutting me off. “I’d be pretty fucking worried if you did.”

Knowing that there’s a chance I won’t be able to give it, I ask, “Then what are you asking for?”

His eyes flick down, landing on my mouth, and suddenly it’s like two weeks of dormant lust springs to the surface all at once, settling liquid-hot at the base of my spine. He reaches over to touch my chin, thumb dragging heavy and warm against my bottom lip. “Please don’t go to someone else.”

My breath hitches as I’m pulled into his