Deviant (Boys of Winter #3) - Sheridan Anne Page 0,16
to go and see it. I’ll stay in the car until you clear it if you have to, but I’m coming and you can’t stop me.”
The guys look around one another, their shifty eyes seriously getting on my nerves, but the hard set of Carver’s jaw tells me that I’m just as much working his nerves as they are mine.
King sighs, seeing that I have them backed into a corner. “We’ll talk about it later,” he tells me. “Let’s just focus on getting you out of here, and once we’re home, we can work out the details there.”
I nod, knowing that’s the best I’m going to get out of them.
“Good,” King says. “Now, can we talk about how Cruz still has the ‘YAHTZEE’ video?”
Grayson scoffs, his tone dark and deadly, and clearly pissed about the whole situation. “How about we talk about how Cruz screamed that he loved Ellie while she was bleeding out?” he says, throwing him right under the bus.
Cruz’s eyes bug out of his head as his sharp gaze slices back to mine. “I … uhh … fuck,” he stumbles out as I try to think back to my time lying in my own blood on the garage floor. The whole thing is blurry, and over the past two days, I’ve only been able to remember little snippets of it.
“You, umm … you said that you love me?” I murmur, keeping my stare locked on Cruz’s as I recall that only yesterday morning, sitting in this very hospital, King had admitted something very similar while talking with his little sister.
Ember clears her throat and gets to her feet. “I think I hear Corey calling my name,” she says, refusing to meet my eyes before she high-tails it out of the room.
King, Grayson, and Carver follow her out, and before I know it, it’s just Cruz and me with nothing but a world of tension sitting between us. “I didn’t mean for it to come out like that,” he tells me. “I was in a panic and terrified that I was going to lose you. I didn’t want you to go without knowing, but you have to know that’s not how I ever intended on telling you. In fact, I wasn’t planning on telling you for a long fucking time.”
My brows furrow as I watch him. “Why not?”
“Because, baby, you’re not fucking ready to hear those words, as much as you think you are, you’re not. I can see it in your eyes now. You’re freaking out, but you don’t need to. I’m not going to force it in your face and demand some bullshit response out of you.”
I watch him carefully. “Are you sure?” I ask, hating how easily he can read me and see the terror on my face. But the terror isn’t there because he loves me. I fucking love that. The terror comes from that deep, dark part of me that’s never been loved. I don’t know how to love and I sure as fuck don’t know what it means to be loved in return.
Cruz stands up and walks toward me, leaning over me with a hand on either side of my hips, being as careful as he possibly can not to jostle me around. “All you need to know,” he tells me, his voice dropping low as his mesmerizing green eyes bore into mine and hold every bit of my attention, keeping me captivated, “is that every fucking word of it is true. I love you, and I have for a while now. I’m all in where you’re concerned, but I don’t expect anything in return. I’m not hanging around, pining to hear you say it back because I know you’re not there yet. I know you feel something for me, and I know that scares the shit out of you, but when you’re ready, you’ll come to me. You already give me everything I need, and that’s more than enough. I’ve told you before, and I’ll tell you a million times more if you need me to. Just getting a piece of you is more than I could ever ask for.”
My hand curls up around the back of his neck and I pull him in close, holding him right in front of me as his forehead drops to mine. “Have I ever told you how fucking incredible I think you are?” I whisper, refusing to take my eyes away from his. “You completely captured me from the day I first met you,