inside, and even if you do go outside, there’s no way for you to fall.”
“I’m not afraid of heights,” I mumble as I step out of the elevator. The top of the tower is surrounded by expansive windows overlooking Seattle and beyond. Wide signs are set up that people are reading and pressing buttons on.
Arlo slides his hand into mine, our fingers weaving as he leads me toward one of the doors that leads to the observation deck. We step outside, and it feels cooler with the elevation, but the wind has blown back the clouds that never did get us wet today, and above us are a million stars that sparkle across the ocean.
“It’s beautiful,” I say.
When Arlo doesn’t say anything, I glance at him, surprised to find him already looking at me.
My heart starts beating too fast again.
I think about how we’re friends, and he’s staying in our apartment, and if he’ll still be there when I get home from Texas. Maybe this tension is because of that or because I haven’t slept with a guy or even made out with a guy in over six months. Is that what’s making me feel drunk? Lust?
“Do you want to go around to the other side?” I ask him, already taking two steps in that direction because I’m chicken shit and scared that if I remain that close to him, I’m going to cave and kiss him and make everything weird and ruin this friendship we’ve built—this positive, happy, easy—good friendship. One where Arlo is my rock, and I’m his lucky charm.
Maybe it’s because of Matt?
Rejection is still burning my skin like a sunburn, and the more I think about it, the more it hurts. I can’t believe he kissed someone and then shared it on social media. I can’t believe he never took the time to call me or text me and say he was interested in someone else. How long has this been going on? And was I naïve to believe it wouldn’t happen?
“There’s CenturyLink Field and The Great Wheel,” Arlo says, stepping beside me again and extending his arm toward the giant Ferris Wheel in the distance. My thoughts scatter as I focus on the city dressed in lights. He presses closer as a couple takes a selfie beside us, his chest against my shoulder, making me once again feel frozen into place. “When we come back in the morning, you’ll be able to see the Cascades and Mount Rainier and Mount Baker and the Puget Sound from up here.”
“If it isn’t covered in clouds, you mean?”
He grins, his gaze dropping to my mouth again and then returning to my eyes. He swallows and tilts his head, a silent battle warring across his features before he drops his attention back to my mouth. “Want to go inside?” he asks.
I nod because I don’t think I’m capable of forming words at this moment.
He doesn’t hold my hand on the way back inside or even touch me. And it makes me feel vulnerable in the worst kind of way.
We circle the inside, reading more information independently, our gazes crossing frequently. There’s tension, and we both feel it, yet neither of us addresses it. Arlo reads about the recent renovation of the spaceship-looking building that stands six-hundred feet above the city, which was originally built in just thirteen-months. I try to look at a board that shows what views look like at other times of the year when the skies are clear, and you can see all the sights Arlo had listed.
My phone vibrates with a call. Rose appears across my screen in an impossible yoga pose that I took months ago. “Hey.”
“Hey, I just wanted to check in with you because I haven’t seen or heard from you all day.”
“Yeah. Sorry. We went and started using the City Pass today.”
“No, don’t apologize. I’m glad you’re having fun. I just wanted to touch base and make sure all is well.”
I nod though she can’t see me, while inside my thoughts are screaming that things aren’t all right. “What are you up to? How was your yoga training?”
“Exhausting,” she says with a sigh. “What’s even more exhausting is a bouquet showed up today from Ian. What guy sends flowers? I told him I don’t date. This is a waste of money.”
“Maybe he thinks you’re worth it?”
“That’s … great, but it’s not going to change my rules.”