Defining Darkness - K E Osborn Page 0,55
me, protectively.
This is the best feeling in the world—I’ve given into the temptation of Nycto.
Ivy is here and safe.
Everything is as it should be.
“Nycto?” I question. Something’s been plaguing my mind since I arrived here.
Will he open up to me now?
“Mmm?”
I hesitate, I don’t want him to get mad at me, but I figure if there’s a time for me to ask, it’s now. “What’s your name?”
He exhales loudly like he’s not sure where to go with that question. I don’t want him to do anything he doesn’t want to. “It’s okay, you don’t have to—”
“Alec…” I pause, my eyes widening in shock. “Alec Ripa.”
Nycto tightens his grip on me as my eyes well with tears. “Thank you… you don’t know what this means to me, Alec.”
“You can only call me that when it’s just us. If there’s anyone else around, it has to be Nycto. It’s a respect thing at the club.”
“I get it. I’ll only use it for emphasis.”
He grins. “Like when you’re screaming out my name in pleasure?”
I slap his chest playfully. “Something like that…” I place my head on his chest, glancing up at him. His hand comes out, stroking my cheek as we stare at each other.
“Can you tell me why the light in here is red?”
His eyes divert. I’m losing him. I’m pushing too much, too soon. “I get it… that you don’t like the light. Sometimes it feels like the light is too much for me. Too overwhelming.”
Nycto’s eyes shine back at me in understanding, like maybe I’ve hit the nail on the head. I just want to understand him.
He clears his throat. “The red helps for sleeping. Sometimes I have trouble getting to sleep. Because I don’t like normal light, having a red LED has the least wattage. It changes the circadian rhythm and improves melatonin.” He scoffs out a half-laugh. “Some shit like that. Some doctor recommended it for nighttime, but I use it in here all the time because I can’t stand normal lighting.”
That’s interesting.
I had no idea he had trouble sleeping. Honestly, since I’ve been here, I haven’t noticed it at all. “I had no idea you had trouble sleeping.”
“Since you’ve been here, I haven’t had any issues.”
“Do you think it’s ‘cause you had someone in your bed with you?”
“It’s ‘cause I have you in my bed with me.”
I lean down, pressing my lips to his briefly. That spark I felt the first time I kissed him is back with a vengeance. My lips tingle as I pull back with a contented sigh.
He’s happy.
At ease, even.
I want to keep prying, but I don’t want to overstep and have him put his walls back up.
“Just ask, Eva,” he interrupts my internal decision-making process.
Nodding, I exhale. “Why do you dislike the light so much?”
He tightens his jaw, his eyes clenching shut like he’s trying to pry out a memory. Instantly, I regret bringing it up. Whatever it is, it must be painful. My hands splay out on his chest, trying to soothe him, and his face softens. His eyes open, a distant stare takes hold as he looks right past me.
“My mom was young when she had me. Fourteen or so, I think they said. She was a runaway. Had no idea what to do with a baby, so she took me to a family care facility and handed me in.”
“So, you don’t know who she is? Or your father?”
“I don’t really care. She left me. It’s her fault I grew up the way I did.”
I tense, but the words come out anyway. “Foster care?”
His body going rigid beneath me. “I moved around a lot when I was young, but when I was about ten, I was placed in a more permanent home. A boys’ home.” I nod, urging him to continue. “I was the youngest of seven boys living in the smallest house. There wasn’t enough room for us all to share the bedrooms, so they moved me into a tiny closet under the stairs. They figured I was the smallest, so I would fit in there.” My stomach twists—that is not okay. It reminds me of some Harry Potter nightmare. “They put in a beanbag for me to sleep on, and I had an overhead light I could pull on the cord to keep me safe. I was so fucking scared of the dark. The other boys knew it, too.” I hate where this is leading. “They would pick on me. They were all older in their teens, so