that,” Eldas says coolly. “I have sent Poppy away on an important mission that will take at least two months still; and I will not call her back. So if you wish for Harrow to receive care you will allow Luella to—”
“Poppy’s grandson. Even that mouse of a man would be better than her.”
I see Eldas’s hands tighten behind his back to the point that his knuckles are paper white. The muscles in his jaw tense. But his eyes are full of sorrow and longing, even as he speaks with all the bitter ice I’ve ever heard the man muster.
“I am the king, and what happens in my castle is my sole discretion.”
“‘Your castle.’ You do not lord over me. I am your mother.”
“A shame you have failed to ever act like it.”
“Eldas.” I touch his elbow lightly, trying to snap him out of this.
“How dare you speak to me that way.”
“How dare you speak to my wife that way!” Eldas’s words reverberate through me. They ward against the ever-rising chill and generate a warm heat that flushes up my arms and settles in my cheeks.
He’s not defending you, Luella, not really. I’m just an easy opportunity for him to jab at his mother. I look away from them, hiding my face as I try and lie to myself.
“Harrow needs his rest,” I say quietly.
“Yes, we’re leaving.” Eldas turns and his large palm rests on the small of my back as he ushers me out of the room. He’s silent as he leads me all the way back to my apartments.
The entire time, his hand remains on my person. It’s warm, for such a cold man. I make no effort to step out of his reach.
Hook is already back and he lets out a soft whine the moment he sees us, lifting his head from his paws.
“Sorry about sending you away,” I apologize to Hook and finally step away from Eldas to crouch down and scratch the wolf behind both ears. “I didn’t want to risk Harrow waking up and being mean to you.”
“No one in this castle will harm Hook. If they did, they would have to face my wrath.”
I look up at Eldas. He seems to sway slightly. Exhaustion is creeping in at his edges and I resist the urge to run to the laboratory and make something to help him relax and sleep deeply.
“Because he is part of you?”
“No, it has nothing to do with me—because you care about him. You, and anything that is yours, are my responsibility to protect.”
“Responsibility,” I whisper, chasing it with a sad laugh.
“Are my honor to protect,” he clarifies without hesitation.
“Thank you,” is all I say. What else can I say to that firm declaration? It brought the heat right back to my cheeks.
“Thank you, Luella.” His eyes linger on me, almost expectantly. “For…” He shakes his head, as if he can’t come up with the words.
“For last night?”
Panic flickers in him. Eldas seems to lean forward, as if drawn to me by the memory of our kiss. I wouldn’t mind if he kissed me again, I finally admit to myself. The thought stirs my own panic and I swallow hard. Seeing it, he instantly pulls away.
“Last night is better left at the bottom of the bottle of mead,” he says finally.
“Is that your way of saying you were drunk?” I ask. Disappointment floods me. I try and erect dams before it can overtake me.
“We both had too much.”
And that’s his way of saying he regrets it. Eldas studies me from the corner of his eye, clearly waiting for my response.
“Right, we did,” I force myself, albeit painfully, to agree. If he wants to back away then I’ll let him. I’m trying to leave anyway.
He has his duties. I have mine. Ignoring last night and anything that might be simmering between us is for the best. We’re only destined for heartache if we continue.
Yet, Eldas seems to deflate some. But he quickly corrects the hunch in his shoulders, no doubt arriving at the same conclusion as me.
Without another word, he departs. I watch him go before taking Hook into our apartments.
For the first time since finding Hook, it feels lonely in the vast landscape of my chambers. For the first time, and despite every last bit of sense telling me not to, I wonder what it would be like to have Eldas stay.
Chapter 25
“You’re up early,” Willow says as he enters the laboratory.