Dead Pretty - Samantha Towle Page 0,45

a handbasket.

“No!” I yell, shoving his hands away from me.

Jack practically jumps back from me, a look of surprise on his handsome face.

And I can’t blame him. We went from sizzling hot to freezing cold in less than a second.

“I’m sorry,” he starts, his hands going up in the air. “I—”

“It’s not your fault,” I cut him off. Shame is coating me like thick black oil. “You didn’t do anything wrong. It’s me … I can’t …” How the hell do I say this? How do I tell him that I can’t get naked with him from the waist up and not explain the reason?

“You can’t what, Audrey?” His voice is soft, calm, measured. Like the way you would speak to a frightened animal.

It makes me feel as pathetic as I know I am.

I don’t know what to say. I stare down at the floor, trying to find the right words.

But there are none.

Jack takes a step closer, but he doesn’t reach for me.

And I won’t lie. It hurts.

I hate that I put this distance between us.

That my past put this distance between us.

“Nothing has to happen tonight. Not until you’re ready.”

I look back up at him. “I am ready. I want you, but …”

“Talk to me …” he urges softly.

“I can’t …” I press a hand against the area just beneath my breasts, at the top of my stomach, where the ugliest physical part of me resides.

I close my eyes and pull in a strengthening breath.

Why didn’t I think of this before? That getting naked with him would be par for the course before having sex with him?

Because I’m stupid.

I was so blinded by lust because I wanted him so very badly that I didn’t think this out at all.

Moron.

“I can’t get naked with you. Well, the top half of me can’t.” I curl my fingers into my tank top, hating the feel of the lumpy skin beneath it. “My bottom half is fine.” God, I sound like a total fucktard. “And I can’t tell you why, so don’t bother asking me. I know that sounds harsh and weird, but it’s the way it is. And if you can’t deal with that, with the way things are … the way I am, then it’s fine. I totally understand, and I won’t take it personally. We can still be friends—if you want to be, of course,” I’m quick to add.

Silence hits the room. The weight of my words settles into the distance between us.

“Audrey … I can’t be friends with you.”

Ouch.

I was expecting it, but it still hurts.

“It’s fine. I totally get it.” My eyes start searching out the location of my sweater. I need to cover up. Which is stupid because it’s not like I’m actually naked right now. If I were, then we wouldn’t be having this conversation.

“No, you don’t.” The firmness of his tone brings my eyes straight back to his. “I can’t be friends with you, Audrey. Because it wouldn’t be possible. Not with the way I feel when I’m around you. Fuck. It’s been a struggle this far, not to touch you … kiss you. So, no, I’m not doing it again. You have something you can’t share with me? Fine. I accept that. Because honestly, Audrey, I will take you any way I can have you.”

My heart is in my throat, trapped there along with any words I might say.

All I can do is stare at him. My chest heaving up and down.

I’m not sure who moves first. Him. Me. Who really cares?

All I do know is that we crash back into each other. I’m in his arms. Our lips devouring. Hands roaming. Bodies melding.

Jack and I seem to have two speeds only. Zero and sixty. We jump from one to the other in the blink of an eye.

But I’m determined that we stay in the fast lane until zero is our only option because we’re both too blissed out to move.

I’ve never had this type of passion with anyone ever. Sure, I’ve had lusty sex in my past. But nothing like what I’m feeling right now with Jack.

I want him with the kind of hunger that could starve a whole goddamn city.

Jack carries me through to my bedroom. He sets me down on the edge of the bed and comes down to his knees in front of me.

Reaching for my bedside lamp, I turn it on, wanting to see him.

The light glows off the golden skin of his chest. His eyes look so