Dating Dr. Dreamy - Lili Valente Page 0,53
to New York and then lied to me about it for a week before—”
“No!” Mason barks before tucking his head to his chest. “No,” he repeats in a softer voice. “I hadn’t forgotten. I just didn’t think it mattered. That’s all part of the past.” He lifts pleading eyes to mine. “I’ve already told you how much I regret the way I treated you. The lease and everything else I did are all part of the same, stupid thing. I screwed up. Royally. Terribly. I know that. But I’m not going to screw up again, and that’s the truth. I’m not hiding anything from you.”
“How can I know that, Mason?” I ask, my voice breaking. “How can I trust a single word you say?”
Mason’s forehead wrinkles. “Because you know I’m telling the truth. You knew it last night when we were lying together, as close as two people can get, talking about how many kids we want to have.”
I shake my head. “We talked about that before. You still left.”
“Please, Lark, it’s not the same.” He laces his fingers together and lifts his joined hands. “Please. There is no doubt in my mind or my heart. I’m ready to promise my life to you. I want to start a family with you. I would marry you this afternoon if I could. Everything I’ve said from the moment I came back to town until now is the absolute truth.”
“I’m sorry, but…I can’t trust that.” I swipe at my cheeks. “I can’t trust you, and without trust, this… This isn’t going to work.”
Mason freezes for a long, silent moment. “So that’s it? It’s over?”
I bite my lip until it hurts—refusing to start crying again, at least not in front of Mason—and nod.
“No.” He shakes his head. “Don’t do this. This isn’t what you want, and it sure as hell isn’t what I want. If you force me out of your life, we’re both going to regret it. Forever. This is so special. We’re special. Together.” He takes a careful step closer. “Just…let’s work this out, okay? I know we can. I know I can make it better if you’ll give me the chance.”
I hesitate.
Give him a chance.
I want to give him a chance, I want to believe that the past five days and the love we’ve rediscovered is real, but…it’s only been five days.
That lease proves Mason can fake anything for five days.
I can’t stop thinking about the way we laughed together four summers ago as we visited one cheap, Atlanta apartment after another, imagining what we were going to name the cockroaches we’d be sharing a kitchen with in our crappy new living space. We were so excited to finally live together that not even the reality of what we could afford on our limited budget had been able to dampen our spirits.
And then, the night he proposed, when he got down on one knee and told me he didn’t want to wait to promise me forever, when I cried and laughed and hugged him so tight…
He had hugged me just as tight, and there had been happy tears in his eyes. There had been no sign, no clue, nothing to warn me to expect the worst.
If I give Mason a chance, I might end up with that happily ever after I was imagining last night. Or I might end up deceived and broken all over again. There’s no way to know for sure. Mason is too good at hiding the things he doesn’t want other people to see.
He’s more of a master of deception than I ever assumed, so adept I will never be able to trust what he shows me on the surface.
Never. No matter how much I want to, no matter how it’s going to rip me apart to lose him all over again.
But, in the long run, it’s better to lose him now than years down the road, maybe after we’ve already started a family, when the situation will be infinitely more complicated. And painful. And sad.
I can’t remember ever feeling this sad. Not even the first time Mason ripped my heart from my chest.
“I’m sorry,” I finally whisper in a defeated voice.
“That’s it?” he asks, his breath coming faster. “You’re not even going to think about it?”
“I have thought about it.” I lift my chin, willing myself to stay strong for just a few more minutes. “It’s over, Mason. For good this time.”
He takes one stunned step back and then another, shaking his head back and