of the curse. But if he lost her, he knew it would be much worse now that they were bonded.
Instinctively, he tightened his grip on her and looked out across the water again, checking to make sure they were safe. "What is with the demons? Why do demons come after you when you die?"
Alice slid off his lap and moved to a seat across from him. She leaned forward, her forearms resting on her thighs. "Angels and demons are two sides of the same being," she explained. "We're connected. For angels, purity trumps and it gives us the freedom to live in this world. For demons, there is no purity or goodness, which bans them from our world." She fingered her arm. "They're always trying to gain access to the physical world."
Ian nodded, well aware of that razor-thin line that Calydons lived by. When Calydons went rogue, they lost their sanity. They weren't demons, but they were damned close. And Ryland...well...Ry was as close as any living creature had ever been to demon. "So, how does that affect you?"
Alice bit her lip. "If the demons can harvest my spirit, they're hoping they can use me as a way to get into the physical realm." She met his gaze. "Cardiff uses demon magic, but in order to do so, the demons have to offer it. He gave me to them as a trade, and he killed me in a way specifically designed to send me to them." She waved her hands. "Demon magic. Rah, rah. Good time for all."
Ian stared at her, outrage for her plight mounting inside him. "So, when you die for good, you'll go to hell? There's no other option for you?"
Alice closed her palm. "My soul is not clean, Ian. As long as it's not completely clean, the demons have access, because we're so closely connected. I would have to become truly pure to avoid it now that I have demon magic in my body." She opened her palm, and he saw a one inch gray circle on her skin. It was bigger than it had been. From their making love? Shit, he hoped not. "I'm losing my angel status, Ian. They're gaining hold."
He took her hand and tried to rub the circle off. It didn't move. "How do you become pure? How do you stop it?" Even as he asked the question, he knew it was stupid. The woman was a fucking angel, a thousand times more admirable than he was. Why should she have to do anything to become pure enough to keep her status? She was already good.
She took her hand back, closing her fist. "I don't know. Standards are high for angels of life because we are so powerful." She rolled her eyes. "Or we're supposed to be powerful, but we all know how great I am."
"So, who makes the rules? Is there some all-powerful council that evaluates you and makes the decision?" Because if there was, he was going to find those bastards and make sure they understood what Alice deserved.
But she shook her head. "There is no one looking over my shoulder. It's just a part of the fabric of my being. It's like your Calydon destiny. It's just the way it is. A metaphysical force that is part of who I am. I don't understand exactly how it works. None of the angels do. We just try to follow the rules as we were taught."
"That makes no sense." He didn't want it to make sense. He didn't like the idea of fate controlling her the way it controlled the sheva bond. It was damn hard to break ties like that.
Shit, this was complicated.
Ian pressed her hand between his palms. "Why do you want to kill Catherine Taylor?" He was burning with the need to understand Alice. She was so complex, a woman of so many facets that he still didn't grasp all that she was, or all that she was struggling with. He felt like he needed to get a handle on it to figure out how to help her. "That can't be good for your soul, can it?"
Alice looked away, focusing on something on the horizon. "It's a long story," she said evasively.
"My calendar's pretty open for the next few hours. I've got time." Ian saw from the look on Alice's face that she wasn't going to tell him, so he leaned forward. "In less than a day, we're going to be in Cardiff's territory. I need to know