The Darkest Knight (Guardians of Camelot #3) - Victoria Sue Page 0,79

the fight. You just worry that Galahad is yours.”

Gawain didn’t answer or look up.

“And I think,” Mel continued, “he’s going to need a lot of special care.” Gawain’s fingers stopped on the keyboard. “I have no idea what being stuck in that awful place for so long has done to him.”

“What if I can’t give him that?”

“Why do you think so?”

“Because I’m no good with people,” Gawain whispered. “Computers, books, translations. These are all my talents. And he’s so much younger than I.”

“What, ten, fifteen years give or take? That’s nothing compared to the rest of us.”

“I doubt if Lance would be happy.”

Mel snorted. “You may have a point, but Lance trusts you with his life. You’re his oldest friend. Who else do you think Lance would trust his son with?”

Gawain was silent for a while. “What if I don’t trust myself?”

“Well, I think you’ll be perfect,” Mel said and stood. He reached down and squeezed Gawain’s shoulder. “I know you love your books, but they can’t love you back.”

But what if no one could?

Chapter 21

For the first time in months, the board remained silent.

Charles shook his head in frustration. There was something wrong. “Could it be because Kay got out?”

“What if something happened to Galahad?” Lance put his head in his hands, and Mel looked at Charles.

“I think we all ought to go to bed. There’s no point sitting around and staying awake. If something happens, we will know straight away.”

Charles met Mel’s determined look. He hadn’t said it offhand as if it was a suggestion. He’d said it with intent, and he wondered if anyone else had noticed.

“Good idea,” Tom said, yawning, and dragged Lucan upright.

“I won’t sleep,” Lucan said.

“Then you can cuddle me while I sleep,” Tom retorted which of course Lucan couldn’t object to.

Gawain, ignoring them as usual, keyed up another screen and picked a book up. “No,” Lance said. “I need everyone at their best to get Galahad.” Gawain met Lance’s gaze in an almost challenging way but shrugged and powered down the screens.

Charles led Kay upstairs and into Kay’s room. He hoped with everything in him he could eventually call it their room. Kay wandered to the bed, still deep in thought.

“What’s the matter?” Charles said. “And that’s apart from the obvious.”

“My head’s too full.” He closed his eyes and swayed. Charles steadied him.

“Too full?”

Kay nodded and rested his head on Charles’s shoulder. “You know I can remember everything?”

Charles nodded.

“Well, sometimes I don’t know what I need to remember.” Charles hesitated, not sure exactly what Kay was saying. “When I was four, Rochelle was going to take me horse riding, but I was scared. We went eventually, but I rode in front of her on a beautiful mare called Klara. It rained, but we took a picnic, sat under a tree, and had cheese and bread. The stable hand was called Ricoh. I wore blue breeches and a white shirt.

“The day after that I had brötchen and honey for breakfast. It was Wednesday. A month later the cook had to leave because her husband got sick. The new one was called Matilde.” Kay paused and opened his eyes. “I can recite every day if I have to, and it would drive me insane if I hadn’t learned to compartmentalize everything, so sometimes I have to go look, like I have a library in my head.”

“And that’s what you’re doing now?”

Kay nodded miserably. “There is something I need to remember. It could have happened five hundred years or five days ago, but I need to know what to go looking for.”

“A bit like looking up a word in a dictionary to spell when you don’t know which word you want.”

Kay smiled for the first time in a good few hours, and Charles hugged him close. “Go to the bathroom, and then let’s go to bed. Relaxing may help.” Kay sighed, then yawned.

“I’m so tired.”

“I’m not surprised,” Charles said indulgently and drew back the comforter, waiting for Kay. When Kay was done, Charles took his turn. For a moment when he was finished, he stared at himself in the bathroom mirror. He had a lot more gray than he had the last time he looked, but his color was better and he felt almost energized. As if looking after Kay gave him purpose and direction that he thought he would never feel again. He had loved seeing the smile on Kay’s face. He would be content to see that every day for the rest of his