darkened blade_ A fallen blade novel - Kelly McCullough Page 0,104
will destroy me.”
Oh, my friend . . .
“If you will unburden your soul to me, perhaps I can help you,” said the Lady. “I am as old as humanity itself and have learned at least a little of wisdom in those years.”
“All right.” I didn’t think there was anything she could do, but perhaps simply talking about it might help. “Where should I start . . . ?” I took a deep breath. “Perhaps with the man who should have died. In those days he was known as Corik Nofather and he was a priest of Shan. . . .”
I slowly spun out the tale of the way that Corik had first been infected with and then bonded to the risen curse. I talked about how he had used his knowledge of the curse to hide its effects on those he infected and made his own, by having them bathe in the blood of the living. I spoke of how he had taken over the High Church of the East by filling the hierarchy with hidden undead who owed him their abject allegiance, and the way that he had then used his undead priests to infect and master most of the rulers and high nobles of the eleven kingdoms, including the new great khan.
I paused then when she held up a hand and said, “Bide.”
The Lady’s eyes went far away, and I sensed that she was communing with the soul of Leivas.
After a time she returned. “The curse has spread far indeed. It is a subtle thing when leavened with fresh blood, very hard to sense. But now that I know to look for it . . .” Her expression was grave. “Leivas cannot reach those who stand too far from the edges of open water here in the western basin, but even that reveals many thousands who harbor the hidden version of the curse. So many rulers and priests and leaders of men . . . The world will shake to its very foundations when the Son of Heaven falls. Thrones will tumble and armies shatter. Blood will run in rivers as those who remain fight for mastery.”
“And that is the core of my problem,” I said. “Namara is dead, and my fellows have placed what is left of her authority in my hands. Justice cries out for me to face the Son of Heaven and make him pay for his crimes, but justice also cries for all the many innocent lives that will be lost in the ruin of empires.”
“I think I begin to understand your dilemma,” said the Lady. “It has fallen on you to decide the fate of the East.”
“And no matter what I choose, the decision will unmake me,” I said, finally speaking aloud the realization that had been growing in my heart. “If I choose to kill the Son of Heaven, all the ruin that follows will be mine. I will have become the Kingdomslayer, and that is too much weight for my shoulders. But, if I choose not to kill the Son of Heaven, all the evil that he does from that day forward will belong to me, and my heart will wither and blacken in my chest. So, each day, I move closer to facing the Son of Heaven, hoping against hope that something will relieve me of the choice before I must make it.”
“The forces you face are terrible in their strength,” said the Lady. “You may well fall before you reach that point of decision.”
“Lady, were it not for my shadow, I would pray for that.” I had not admitted the thing even to myself until now, but I could no longer deny it. Death in the course of duty attempted would buy me free of the burden of choice, and if it wouldn’t end Triss as well, I would gratefully seek it.
“Aral, you can’t mean that!” Triss spoke aloud, his voice thick with anguish as he climbed up onto the table and looked into my eyes.
I didn’t answer him, because I couldn’t bring myself to speak the words, but through our link I could feel how much my silence told him.
“I didn’t know,” said Triss. “I didn’t understand it was hurting you so. Oh, Aral.”
“It’s all right, Triss. You couldn’t have seen it. However well you know and love me, I had hidden the worst of it even from myself till this very moment.”
“No, it’s more than that,” said Triss, sounding very worried indeed. “I am not human. I