“I will not feel sorry for myself,” she mumbled. “I have a good man who loves me and that is all that matters.”
The opposing ache in her stomach refused to abate, and she shook her head. It made no sense to feel this way. She loved Tarr and was not interested in any other man, so why should this disturb her?
“I am foolish,” she declared out loud.
“Why?”
She jumped off the bed at the sound of Tarr’s voice. “I did not hear you enter.”
“You were lost in thought.” He walked over to her.
She nodded not wanting to share those thoughts with him, for he would think her more foolish than she thought herself.
“Tell me what is wrong?”
“Nothing is wrong.” She attempted a smile that faltered much too easily.
He ran his hand up her arm slowly. “We will wed soon and I hope to share a life with you. I had hoped we would share everything, even our troubled thoughts. Had we not agreed upon sharing?”
She rolled her eyes, groaned, and plopped down on the edge of the bed. “I thought myself knowledgeable about love, but I was wrong. Just because you want to love does not mean you know how to love, and I have recently come to realize that I know nothing of love.”
Tarr sat beside her. “Neither do I.”
“You sound as if you do.”
“I try because I love you.”
“See.” She waved her hands in the air.
“See what?”
“How good you are.”
He grabbed her chin. “Stop and tell me what is wrong. It does not matter who is good at love and who is not, we both love each other and that is what matters.”
“I told myself that.”
“Then what could be wrong?”
She really felt foolish and wondered how she could avoid telling him the truth, then thought better of it. She would expect honesty from him; she could give him no less.
“You asked who else would love me.”
“I but teased you.”
“I know but the truth is that there is no other man who would love me. No man ever showed interest in me. No man ever attempted to kiss me.”
“I can understand that.”
“Really?” Fiona asked, affronted.
“Aye, you are too much of a woman for just any man. You required a man of strength and fine character. One who was not intimidated by your power but admired it and understood it. A man who would not attempt to bend you to his will but who would accept your passionate spirit and honor it.”
An eager smile surfaced easily on Fiona.
“As for never being kissed?” He ran his thumb over her lips. “These belong to me and honored I am that you saved them for me. I am glad no other has kissed you but me; it makes our kisses that more intimate and special.”
She threw her arms around his neck. “I love you so very much.”
Her hugged her. “That is good for I am the only man—”
“I ever want in my life,” she finished.
The door burst open and Anya stood for a moment startled, then she shook away her shock and grew apologetic. “How rude of me not to have knocked. I thought Aliss might have returned—”
“It is all right, Anya,” Tarr said. “We have set things right here.”
“There was something wrong? Fiona, you are all right?”
“What is wrong with Fiona?”
Fiona heard her sister’s worried voice before she saw her push past her mother at the open door to enter the room. Raynor followed, though remained just outside the door near his mother.
“Fiona?” Aliss asked with concern. “I came to join you for the morning meal and did not find you downstairs. I worried since you never miss a meal.”
Fiona smiled at her sister and gave a quick glance around the room at everyone present. They loved her, each and every one of them in their own special way; she truly was lucky.
She jumped up tugging Tarr along with her. “I am starving.”
Aliss laughed. “I suggest we get to the table before her or else there will be nothing left for us.”
Fiona zipped past her sister, leaving Tarr in her wake. “I will beat you there.”
Aliss yelped and hurried after her while a laughing Anya attempted to catch them.
Tarr walked over to Raynor. “The buttery is stocked, we are safe and will not starve.”
Raynor grinned and, as they walked, said quietly, “We have received word from the Wolf.”
Chapter 34
“What does the Wolf say?” Tarr asked, entering his solar, Raynor shutting the door behind him.