slumped to the ground with a painful and surprised grunt.
“Guess she only lets the Heirs pass her around,” another boy slurred as the crowd laughed. I considered kneeing him in the balls too, and when I moved toward him, the coward flinched and covered his junk. I snorted and kept on walking.
Once outside, I ran on the wet glass, dodging discarded bottles and couples as I made my way through the expansive gardens where Luis and I used to wrestle and play hide and seek. The fall air was crisp, and I huddled my arms around my stomach as I moved, distancing myself from the loud music and party.
When the garden shed came into view, I sighed in relief. It wasn’t a special building, not by any stretch of the imagination. But it held sweet memories, and right then, I needed a place that housed a past that was better than my present.
Once inside, I pulled my phone from my clutch. With shaky fingers, I texted my driver to pick me up. It would be forty-five minutes before he could get to me, so I took a moment to look at the place where I’d gotten my first kiss, and the memory flooded back.
“What if I’m not good at it?” I asked shyly. We were hiding from Godfrey in the garden shed, laughing to ourselves as he called out for us.
“You’ll be perfect at it. You should get the first out of the way. I’m happy to help you with it,” Rogue said with a casual shrug, but I could see the bead of sweat on his upper lip and the way his body was rigid, despite the calm tone. “Come here, Scar.”
I shuffled closer to him and placed my trembling hands on his chest. “Just one kiss. I don’t want to be the only girl in eighth grade that’s never kissed nobody.”
Rogue cupped my cheek, leaning forward to blow his breath down my neck. It smelled like the expensive whiskey we’d stolen from his daddy’s stash. His daddy who was never home to notice, anyway. “One kiss,” he promised, before pressing his lips to mine.
Dismissing the memory, I leaned my back against the wall of the wood shed and slid down. I’d promised myself that they’d gotten the last of my tears, but new disappointments seemed to want to spill down my cheeks. I swiped at the harsh moisture collecting in my eyes and balled my fists.
Rogue was always in charge, always commanding me to take a chance and do the things that scared me. None of them would ever admit it, but he ran them all. They followed him simply because his mere presence demanded submission.
They’d been right when they said I was hoping that something would be different tonight. I’d hoped that Rogue would see me all dolled up, that he would realize that I was leaving, and that something would change. At the very least, I’d hoped that I’d get a break from the hatred in their eyes, and instead see lust. But that hatred had just mixed with cruel desire. It was apparent in the way Rogue had held me against my will. In the way that Luis had scraped my skin with his blade. It was obvious in the way that Bonham wouldn’t quite meet my gaze, and the way that Godfrey opened that door for me to go meet my humiliation.
Their hungry, dilated eyes may have betrayed some desire for my body, but they still wanted to crush my soul.
I placed my shaking palms on the wooden floor, trying to ground myself. For a moment, I closed my eyes, trying to stay in the memory of being thirteen again, and having Rogue’s mouth against mine.
He’d been so sweet with me. So slow and patient. And when his tongue had dipped into my mouth, everything had changed for me. It was no longer about a rite of passage—of completing an important step with someone I trusted. When Rogue had cupped my face and kissed me like he cared about me, something opened up inside of me.
When he’d pulled away, our brown eyes had locked, but if he could sense the change in me, he didn’t mention it. After that day, I stopped looking at him like just a friend, and I saw him as so much more.
One kiss and I’d been hooked. And while I was the only girl who was allowed to hang out with them, Rogue didn’t have a change of heart