“No.” I chuckle. “I need serious interview clothes for Imperial College.”
“Ah. That.” He leans in. “You’re not going to talk to your father about the Royal College of Art?”
Considering that Dad’s been ghosting me in the house, and didn’t attempt to force me into those dreadful breakfasts, I don’t see the point.
“This is your future. You’re not supposed to make your parents happy on the expense of what will make you happy.”
“Wow. Since when did you become so wise, bug?”
His smile is faint. “Since I’m not going into engineering.”
“Oh. Why not?” Dan’s family owns an engineering company. He and Zach are expected to take over the family business.
Since I’ve become best friends with Dan, he’s always planned to do engineering in Cambridge. He has all the high grades and impressive records to fly him there.
Now, I feel like a horrible friend for not picking up on his change of heart earlier.
“I’m going to be a solicitor.”
“That’s also cool, but what made you change your mind?”
“Engineers are considered nerdy especially in college. Besides, solicitors have a more active sex life.”
“Please tell me you’re not changing interest because of a sex life.”
“It plays a part. Okay, a huge part. But no, I feel like I’m more fit for winning verbal arguments.”
I hold his hand. “I’m so proud of you. Whatever you choose, bug.”
“Me, too.” He removes his hand. “But don’t touch me. Captain is fucking crazy about that.”
Both of us laugh, knowing exactly how true that is.
My phone vibrates with a text.
Dad: Meet me in the school’s car park.
My heart starts beating loud. Why would Dad come to meet me at school?
“Do you want me to go with you?” Dan asks, apparently having seen the text.
“No. I’m cool. It’s going to be cool.”
I’m lying.
I’m freaking out on the inside.
Dad told me two days ago that he wanted to talk to the family about something important, but I never thought it’d be so soon.
Maybe he’s had enough and will finally adopt Nicole and throw me away.
As I walk out of the school, my chest tightens until it’s painful.
All this time, I convinced myself that I don’t care if Dad adopts Nicole. It’s not like I want to be Clifford’s princess anyway. But now that it’s becoming a reality, I feel like crying.
He’s my dad, not hers. Mine.
Deep inside, there’s a part that still longs for the father who used to carry me on his shoulders when I was a little girl.
The sound of rain fills the car park. Since it’s close to the afternoon, almost all students’ and teachers’ cars are gone.
I open my umbrella and step into the wet pavement.
It’s dark and humid and so freaking wet. If I weren’t anxious out of my mind, I would’ve removed the umbrella and stood in the rain.
I walk into the car park, searching for Dad’s Mercedes. It’s becoming so dark and no light is turned on, so I can’t see in the long distance.
My phone vibrates.
Levi: Practice was cancelled. Come to the locker room.
Just reading his text lifts something heavy and crushing off my chest. The thought of him always puts me in a special mood. It’s like I become invincible knowing he’ll always be there for me.
Since Mum’s death, I’ve been a living dead until Levi breathed life into me.
I open the text to type back when strong lights blind me. I freeze and a tremor shoots through my limbs.
I continue staring ahead, but I can’t see anything due to the light. Just like that day at the party.
My heartbeat speeds up and my hands tremble so hard, the phone clutters to the ground.
Move. Move. Freaking move.
Everything around me disappears except for the sound of the downpour. The smell of the earth after the rain and blinding white light.
* * *
“Honey, give me the phone.”
“Is it Dad again?” I can’t help the disregard in my tone.
Mum smiles. “We have big news for you, honey.”
“Is it about Grandpa’s death?”
Her brows furrow. “Well, yes, but this means something more for us. For our family.”
“Family? What family, Mum? He’s married and happy with his blondie aristocrat and daughter. He’s not a part of our family.”
“Star…” her voice softens. “Everything isn’t what it seems.”
“Yeah, sure thing, Mum. Dad didn’t leave us for another freaking family.”
“Didn’t you say you wanted to live with him?”
I rummage in her bag for the phone. “That was eons ago. I’m never living with him without you.”
She draws in a deep breath. “I’m done running, hon. I’m ready