Crazy Stupid Bromance (Bromance Book Club #3) - Lyssa Kay Adams Page 0,57
face dropped to her shoulder. “I’m sorry, Missy. I’m sorry that you ever had to make those kinds of choices, that my own fucking daughter had to go without a goddamned toy at Target because her mom couldn’t afford it while her father was off making fucking millions of dollars.”
She held him while he cried, until his strength gave way and he leaned against the wall behind them. He slid down to the floor and sat with one knee raised.
“You were right,” he said.
“About?”
“It wouldn’t have made a difference.”
Missy took pity on him and joined him on the floor. “Thank you for admitting that.”
He rolled his head against the wall to look at her. “I was terrified of being a father. Of what it would mean, not just for me, but for her. All I am, all I know, is football. She was better off without me, and we both know it.”
“Is that your justification or your apology?”
“It’s my regret.” AJ reached up and pushed her hair off her forehead. “But it’s not just Tara I regret. I missed out on other things too.”
The weight and meaning of his gaze made her cheeks blaze.
“I missed out on you. On watching you be a mom and grow into the woman you are. I think I would have liked being part of that.”
Her heart caught. He didn’t know what he was saying. He was just full of remorse and whiskey sentiments. “You’re still romanticizing things. You didn’t love me. We wouldn’t have gotten married, and even if we had, it would have been miserable. You know that.”
“It wouldn’t be miserable now.”
She laughed out loud and let her head fall back against the wall. He really was drunk.
“We could try, Missy. Couldn’t we?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
She rolled her head to look at him. “Because you don’t really want to.”
“Yes, I do. I want to sweep you off your feet the way I should have back then. I want to buy you your dream house and pay for Tara’s college and take you on trips. I want to give you jewelry and—”
Disappointment brought her back to her feet. “Is that what you think I want or need? What Tara needs?” She shook her head before he could respond. “We don’t need you to show off for us. We just need you to be here. There’s no grander gesture than that. And it’s the one thing you have never been able to give us.”
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Alexis had never considered herself a coward.
Naive, maybe. Misguided for sure. But everything she’d ever done, every horrible mistake she’d ever made, had been rooted in reasons.
Not necessarily good reasons. Sometimes really bad reasons. Sometimes the reason was that she had no other choice. But not once did she ever feel like she’d done something purely out of fear.
Not until she told Noah she needed space and then walked away from him on Monday. It seemed like the right thing to do at the time, but as the days passed, doubt and regret followed by a punishing dose of loneliness made clear what had really been driving her decision: cowardice. She’d been humiliated by his reaction to their kiss, and so she’d simply gone into hiding. She’d spent all week avoiding everyone and their questions—Liv, Jessica, Sonia. She threw herself into work and dodged all attempts to get her to talk.
Even when the call came in from the transplant center with the news that she had passed the initial blood test, making her a possible match for the transplant, she had the transplant team tell Elliott and Candi rather than calling them herself.
So it really shouldn’t have been a surprise on Thursday night when a vicious pounding at her front door brought her reluctantly downstairs. She opened the door and found Liv, Jessica, Thea—Liv’s sister—and Sonia there. They held bottles of wine, cartons of ice cream, and determined expressions that left her no choice but to step back and let them in.
“Sit,” Liv said, pushing Alexis toward the couch in her living room. “We’ll take care of everything else. And then you’re going to tell us what the hell is going on.”
Alexis feigned ignorance. “What do you mean?”
Jessica and Sonia plopped down on opposite ends of the couch and tugged her down into the middle. “Don’t play dumb,” Jessica said. “You’ve been weird all week, and Noah hasn’t been in the café since Monday morning.”
“We’ve both been busy.”
“Is that why he looks like a puppy who got his favorite toy taken away?” Thea