THE CRAZY GOOD SERIES - Rachel Robinson Page 0,280

was ancient history? Does he know how easily she could be mine? “I promised no hanky panky and I’m not sure how much longer my dog will stay down.”

Tears form in her eyes, but she smiles. “Namaste right here,” she quips. Shaking my head, I laugh. “For right now.” We talk for a while like that, hand in hand. She asks me about my aunt and my job, and if she can decorate my apartment, and if I have girlfriends. Lainey rapid fires the questions one after the other and I answer her honestly. She doesn’t bring up my years away. I can see when her mind veers there, but she shuts it down immediately. We start commenting on old ladies power walking on the beach and mundane stuff that couples always talk about. It’s time.

I ask the question that burns a hole in my mind. “Does he know?” Everyone has secrets. Lainey’s are paramount. Briefly, she glances at me and then away, her lips a drawn tight line. I can’t stay away from her any longer. Crouching in front of her, I force her down onto her back, my hands on each side of her head. Her breath hitches, and my own heart stammers. In the push-up position over her, I bend my elbows so I can get closer—to smell her, to feel her body heat against mine. Her lips part. She wants me to kiss her. I ask her again, “Did you tell him?”

Without hesitation, she simply says, “No.” When her beautiful eyes find mine again, I lean my forehead against hers and breathe her intoxicating scent into my body. It’s a moment I’ll always remember. Similar to the others that are vividly stored in my memory bank. Our first kiss and what happened directly following the kiss, the marriage proposal, the tearful goodbye before I left for the life-changing deployment. It was like she knew, but how could she? And now this: her reply of no means everything. More importantly, it changes everything.

It’s the moment I know without a shadow of doubt that, after all this time, she’s still mine.

He doesn’t know.

CHAPTER SIX

Lainey

I DIDN’T INTENTIONALLY keep the yoga date from Dax, but I didn’t tell him either. Of course I knew he’d be upset. I’m fucking everything up and at the moment I can’t find it in me to care as much as I logically know I should. Being with Cody gives me a feeling that I don’t get anywhere else. It’s strange. It’s electric. The absence of it makes me want it that much more. You know how some people have secrets hidden so well that they can convince themselves they don’t exist? I’m the owner of one of those. I think all of the small lies that aren’t really lies trickle into the blank space where the one we don’t speak of resides. Cody is the only one who knows. This just complicates everything now when I’m dealing with Dax.

I repeat myself one more time just to drive the point home. “I’m sorry, Dax. I am.” He’s shirtless, his tan muscles rippling every time he paces my bedroom. His blond hair is wet from a shower and the grit at the bottom of the shower is why I was caught. Yoga at the beach wasn’t enough of an explanation. He then asked with whom, and I would never lie outright. I told him the truth and he damn near blew a gasket.

From my perch at the end of my bed he is an angry mess. He stops in front of me, just far enough away that I can’t touch him. “You didn’t even plan on telling me. How sneaky is that, Lainey? What am I supposed to think? I’ll ask once more. Are you fucking him?” Ouch.

I look down at the floor. Not because I’m lying, but because I wish I was fucking him and I feel like a disgraceful asshole. “No. I would never cheat on you, Dax. Not even with him.”

“You say that like he’s a goddamn deity. Not even with him. I mean, fuck, what am I supposed to do?” he growls, bringing a big hand through his hair and pacing in front of me a few more times. He’s making me agitated. I’m not in a position to ask him to stop. He drops to a squatting position, his forearms against his thighs with his head down.

I don’t dare make a move to approach him. When he’s angry he likes space.