THE CRAZY GOOD SERIES - Rachel Robinson Page 0,195

for my husband. Years later, I’m just now crawling out of that hole, but the memories continue to affect me as if it was yesterday. The thoughts swirl wildly in my mind and I forget where I’m at.

A large hand folds around my shoulder. “Help Lainey get the ornaments ready for the exchange, yeah?” Steven asks, breaking the awkward silence. All eyes are on me—ostensibly to see if I’ll uphold my usual all business demeanor or have a complete breakdown. I let Steven help me up and out of my chair, making sure my head is held high. Possibly on the verge of hyperventilating, I figure it’s my only option to keep my dignity.

“That was stupid of me to bring up,” Lainey whispers when we’re alone. I’m offended, wholly and truly.

“Of course it’s not. They are deploying. It’s a perfectly acceptable topic to discuss. Don’t you dare do that. ” Narrowing my eyes, I make sure she knows I’m serious. Lainey nods, throws a tiny, half smile, and starts placing the wrapped ornaments on the large coffee table in her formal living space. I plaster a fake smile and play along for the rest of the evening. Everyone has a great time and they pretend to forget my mini panic attack at dinner. Drinks splash freely and Christmas music blares through expensive speakers. Taking my glittering cowgirl boot ornament, I say my goodbyes, ignoring the pity in my friends’ eyes and start for home.

Steven’s truck growls up the drive behind me, his headlights casting my shadow on the expansive flower garden. Parking in his usual spot, he hops out and catches up. Normally I’d care about my reputation—his truck at my house all night—but tonight I can’t find a reason to care.

I hear his footsteps fall behind me. “Despite what everyone thinks, I’ll never be the person I was before. It’s unfair for me to even try to pretend that you’re getting a fair shot,” I admit. “He’s there for good, Steven. Stone is there for good.” He stays silent yet close, as we walk into my foyer and into my office. Ignoring him to the best of my ability, mostly out of shame, I turn on my computer and kick off my red-bottomed heels.

“I’m not asking for him not to be,” he rasps. I let my gaze flick up to meet his as he looms over my desk, his large hands splayed on the dark, polished wood. “I’m demanding what’s left.”

I swallow the lump in my throat. His demand is so similar to something Stone would say that it takes me a second to compose myself. “There’s not much left,” I reply, but it comes out more like a squeak.

“I’ll decide what’s enough,” Steven says, leaning over to place his warm lips on top of mine. The current that passes between him and me is immediate, causing my entire body and mind to react to his mere touch. My hands find his face as I lean toward him to deepen the kiss. I forget about the horrible dinner conversation; my mind clears of everything except for Steven. He groans, my eyes flutter closed, and I want so badly to have all of him. Maybe I can give him all of me and I’ll eventually be whole again. It’s a thought I’ve never even entertained before now.

“Okay,” I whisper, as he pulls his wet mouth away from my own.

“I’m going to get my stuff out of the truck because if this desk wasn’t in the way, I’d have your hot body naked and filled before you speak another word.” He licks his mouth, his eyes settling on my hips, my chest, and then my neck. Steven stalks out of my office without another word. I let out a huge breath in a rush.

My cheeks feel hot and the fire is already lit, and there’s only one way to extinguish it.

Steve

If you love something, don’t set it free. Hold on to it tightly. Never let it go. If you lose your grasp, it will come back eventually. But it will be different. Ruined.

Morganna is the strongest woman I’ve ever known. To see her so fucked up over a mere conversation does things to my heart that I don’t want to claim. The wall she puts up for everyone else is gone when it’s just me and her. I have her trust. It doesn’t make it any easier to see her deal with it all this time later. Losing Stone was hard