“What was I doing while I was naked?” I asked teasingly.
“This,” he said seriously. “Just this.” He sighed and laid his forehead against the small pooch beneath my belly button that had refused to disappear, even though I’d lost all the baby weight. My body was never going to be the same, but I found that it didn’t bother me that much.
“Well, that’s not very imaginative,” I said, running my hand through his hair.
“Doesn’t need to be,” he replied. “This is my happy place. Right here.”
“I could probably make you happier,” I mused, giggling as he tipped his head back and looked at me.
“Still too soon,” he said. “I looked online.”
I huffed out a laugh. “I don’t know,” I said, kneeling down with him, grateful for the quilt we’d left on the floor for Olive to lay on. “I’m feeling pretty good.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.” I leaned up and kissed the center of his throat. “Do you have any condoms?”
“Yep,” he said instantly. “I got lube, too.”
“Lube?” I sputtered, my eyes widening. “I wasn’t offering you back door action.”
Mark started laughing. It was the kind of laughter that was so hard and fast that it didn’t even make any noise. His body shook with it.
“What?” I asked in confusion, laughing a little, too.
“I didn’t get it for that,” he wheezed. “I read that it might help, you know, when you get back in the saddle.”
“What?” I asked, still staring at him.
“Breastfeeding,” he said breathlessly. “And you know, the hormone shit.”
“The hormone shit?” At this point, I knew what he was trying to say, but I got a small sliver of satisfaction watching him try to explain.
“You might be dryer than normal,” he finally said in exasperation, clearing his throat uncomfortably. “And things might still be, you know, tender. So, lube. It’s supposed to help.”
My lips twitched.
“You knew that,” he said flatly.
“It is seriously sweet that you actually searched the internet to see how to have sex with me,” I said, fighting a smile. “Who said chivalry is dead?”
“You’re an asshole,” he said, grinning. “You know that?”
“I’ve heard that, yeah,” I said.
Mark shook his head, his hands sliding up my back until they reached my head. Leaning forward, he kissed me, his lips pulling at mine. Knowing that we were actually going to have sex, well thought out and carefully planned by him, sex, made my hands shake. It had been so long.
“Hold that thought,” he said, twisting to reach for his bag. A second later, he pulled out a small, wrinkled paper bag. “Condoms,” he said, pulling out a box and handing it to me. “I’ll get the lube ready.”
I nodded and started tearing at the cardboard. I was nervous, and the situation wasn’t helping. I shivered. Without his hands on me, I was acutely aware of the cool air around us and my lack of clothing.
“Hey,” he said, gently pulling the box from my fingers. “Hey, no rush.”
“I just thought—”
“When have I ever fucked you without playin’ first?” he asked, raising one eyebrow. “Come here.”
My nerves vanished as he pulled me against his chest, his hands sliding down my back until they gripped my ass. Lifting me a little, he tipped his head down to mine and kissed me slow and deep. It was languid and a little bit filthy, and I whimpered as he bit my bottom lip just hard enough to sting.
“Lay down,” he said, his voice low.
I wasn’t sure how long he explored my body, running his lips over my shoulders and down my arms, sliding his hands from the tips of my toes to the juncture of my thighs. I lost count of the number of love bites he left on my ribs and the bottom of my breasts and the insides of my legs. But, when he finally slid his long body up and my knees fell open to welcome him, I’d lost any reservation whatsoever.
I sucked in a quick breath as the cool lubricant landed on my skin, the sensation seriously erotic as he used his fingers to warm it, sliding it over my skin and finally pressing one, and then two fingers inside of me.
“Okay?” he asked, his nose touching mine.
“Yeah.” Closing my eyes, I tipped my head back and relished the feeling. It had been years since anyone had been inside me, and nothing had even come close to the way Mark’s hands felt on my body. He’d been the ruler against which everyone else had measured and come up short.