would slide toward the middle and sit right next to me, she doesn’t, and she probably never will again. I miss it, the feel of a soft body next to my own as I drive down the road. The way her hand would rest on my thigh and her head on my shoulder.
Fuck.
I don’t need to think about that shit. It was a lifetime ago, and it isn’t going to happen again, it’s a chapter closed and done.
Pulling through the gate, I shift the truck into park and jump out, closing the gate behind me and chaining it before I get back inside of the pickup, back inside where I can smell her perfume and even her goddamn shampoo.
“I can’t believe you still have this thing and that it still runs,” Stephanie says as soon as I start to drive forward.
I take the road slower than I usually would, not just for Stevie’s sake, but also because of the lumber I have in the back, at least that’s what I tell myself.
“My daddy’s truck, Stevie. I wouldn’t ever get rid of it,” I state.
She’s quiet for a moment. “How are your parents?”
I almost snort, but I decide to curb my dickheadedness for the moment. “Dad died about ten years ago, Mama followed him two months later. Guess she didn’t want to be without him, can’t say I blame her, they’d been together since they were eleven years old.”
“They were young,” she breathes.
“Forty-three years old,” I say, trying not to get choked up.
I miss my parents, for their faults, which they each had, they were good people. They gave me more love than I probably deserved at times. They loved each other, and they tried their damnedest to love their neighbors.
“How’d it happen?”
I want to deny her the knowledge, she doesn’t fucking deserve to know, but I’m not that big of a dick. Well, I am, but I don’t feel like being one today for whatever reason. Pulling the truck up to the side of the barn, I shift it into park and turn to face her, leaving my wrist on the steering wheel, my hand dangling down.
“Cancer took my dad. Mama was just brokenhearted and tired.”
Stephanie reaches out, taking my hand in hers and squeezing it gently. “I’m sorry, Ford, I really am.”
Nodding, I close my eyes for a moment, reopening them to look at her. “What’re you doin’ here, Stevie?”
“I wanted to talk to you. I, it’s been so long and there’s a lot that was left unsaid between us,” she whispers.
“Here in Gallup, what’re you doing here in Gallup?”
She licks her lips, her hand still on mine, searing my goddamn skin with her touch. Those big blue eyes that I once knew so goddamn well that I could read every fucking thought in her head, or at least I thought that I could, stare back at me.
“My father died a few months ago. I didn’t know he still owned the house here, not until the lawyer started going through his papers with me. I didn’t think that I should just sell it as is, he kept it for a reason. I figured I should go through it, make sure there wasn’t anything important inside.”
“You been in there, yet?” I ask.
She shakes her head, her hand falling from mine as she shifts her gaze to looking out the front windshield of the pickup. I lick my bottom lip, watching her, wishing she weren’t so close and yet, hoping she gets closer.
“How’d he pass?”
“Cancer,” she whispers.
“Your mama?”
“Heart attack five years ago.”
“Seems we got that in common. Only children with no parents,” I point out.
She nods, then turns to face me. Her eyes are watery, but her tears don’t fall. She blinks them away, then she gives me that beautiful fucking smile that I’ve dreamt about for seventeen years and never thought that I would see in person again. It’s just as breathtaking as I remember.
“Seems we do. What do you want to talk about? Sun’s high and I got a back fence to mend. My busy season’s approaching, I need to get that done before it’s here.”
She inhales a breath through her nose, her eyes finding mine. “I’m sorry.”
Arching a brow, I wait for her to elaborate, but she doesn’t. She just watches me, waiting for me to respond.
Unfuckingbelievable.
That’s what she is.
Shaking my head, I turn toward the door, pushing it open and jumping out. Ignoring her, I make my way toward the back of the truck and grab an