Cowboy Logic - B.A. Tortuga Page 0,75
keep it so if you want to read it later you can.”
“If he got beat up so damn bad, why isn’t he here? Why didn’t he come to let us help him? Why didn’t he come here?” Travis was fixin’ to cry, and Ellie was standing there, staring at them with eyes like saucers.
“It’s not our call. He had to go where he would feel best while he recovered.” Jericho didn’t take Trav to task for the cursing. “Maybe his letter says why.”
“I hate it here. It’s because he’s gay, isn’t it? That’s why he left? Because he’s gay and he’s out.”
“Trav.”
That wasn’t for Ellie’s ears.
“Just tell me the truth!”
“That’s part of it, yes. Ellie, you need to go get changed.” She’d worn a pretty dress to school, and they still had to do chores.
“Okay. Okay, Daddy…” She was scared now, he could see it in her face.
“It’s okay, baby girl. Gimme a hug.” He held out his arms, hugging and kissing her before he sent her off. Then he growled at Trav. “She doesn’t need to get all freaked-out.”
“Excuse me! I’m supposed to lie to her?” Travis looked at him, eyebrows lowering in a frown. “Did he leave because you two are lovers?”
His mouth opened, then closed. He clenched his hand hard to keep it from flying out to smack Trav in the face, an urge he’d never once had in his life. Jesus.
“Do you want your letter or not?”
“Yeah.” Travis took it. “You know, you can be with anyone you want. I love you because you’re my dad. I’m not an asshole. I love you. I love Logic. I don’t care that you’re gay. Maybe you shouldn’t either.”
He might have a stroke. “I love you too, kiddo. I really do. Half an hour until chores, okay? We’ll talk more about this later.” Jericho didn’t want Travis to feel ignored or invalid. “I’m hurting right now.”
“Me too.” Travis met his eyes, solid as a rock. “Me too.”
Then his boy went to his room, letter clutched tight in his hand.
God help him.
Please.
He tore the envelope open, slicing the hell out of his finger—which was the cherry on top of today’s shit sundae, thank you very much.
The note was simple, written on Bailey’s stationery.
J.,
I never thought I’d fall in love when I came home.
I don’t regret it.
I don’t regret you.
I regret not being able to be us.
Love you.
Logic.
He crumpled that letter up without even thinking, clenching his fist against the pain of it. Love you.
Why couldn’t that be enough?
Chapter 29
If his motherfucking phone didn’t stop ringing, Logic was going to scream.
He’d ordered a pair of headphones so he could at least answer, but he was trying to write and…
Mike.
Asshole.
“I can’t write books for you if you keep bothering me!”
“I can’t send you to a book signing in the shape you’re in. If you would answer my Skype calls, which were scheduled months ago, I wouldn’t have to keep ringing your cell.” Mike sounded unimpressed.
“Fuck off, dude.” He rolled his eyes as the laughter started. “Seriously, do you have any idea how hard it is to type one-handed?”
“Do you have any idea how hard it is to reschedule your entire life because you got into a redneck fight?”
“Yeah. He hit me with a truck.”
“Over and over, apparently. I saw the claim from the rental insurance. Look, we need to just have lunch. I’ll come up from LA, okay?”
“Can we eat here? I’m not going out yet.”
“Of course. I’ll bring something wonderful. Greek?”
It was good to have someone who knew him. “Please.”
“I’ll be up day after tomorrow, and you can tell me all. Well, at least all you can tell me and have plausible deniability.” Mike snorted. “Seriously, though, do you need anything? Grocery delivery? Laundry carry out?”
Oh. Laundry. “I have the grocery delivery organized. I don’t need much, you know?”
“Sure. Order out from that diner, huh? Get pancakes. I’ll see you in two.” Mike was a good guy. Mostly.
“Right on.” He hung up, but he wasn’t ready to face cutting pancakes. Maybe tomorrow.
He dragged his finger over Jericho’s phone number on his phone, wanting to call, wanting to hear Jericho’s voice. That would just prolong shit. He needed a clean break.
Like his arm, not his collarbone.
He needed to write. That was it.
Chapter 30
“Come on, Ellie. We have a date with Gran.” Travis was going to spend the night with Kody, so Tammy had offered to take him and Ellie to Molina’s in Greenville for veggie nachos.
“Okay, Daddy.” She smiled, but she seemed