Conscience - Cecilia London Page 0,146

somehow gave her a free pass.

Caroline frowned at her. “This family isn’t a democracy. You don’t get to vote.”

“What if I refuse to go?” she challenged.

Of course Marguerite wasn’t going to make this easy. Not with her genetics. “I know you won’t do that to me.”

Sophie broke in. “Mo, I don’t want to go alone!”

“Listen to me.” Caroline grasped both their hands. The bag on her lap tumbled to the floor. “I need you to trust that I’m doing what’s best for you. Jack and I will meet up with you as soon as we can. Chrissy and Tom are going to get you up north and we’ll come right after that. I swear.”

“Then why can’t you leave with us now?” Sophie asked.

Caroline had a feeling that this was going to be a continuing theme for the next twenty-four hours, and she would never be able to give her a satisfactory answer. “We just can’t.”

Marguerite yanked her hand away from Caroline’s. It took mere seconds before Sophie did the same, though her withdrawal came with a bit more reluctance. Caroline couldn’t blame them for being pissed at her. She was mad at herself. But she could do this without falling apart. She had to.

“Jack and I are going to help you pack,” she said. “We’ll have tomorrow morning and afternoon to spend every minute with each other. And then you, Chrissy, Tom, and Jess will get to where it’s safe, where I won’t have to worry about you as much.”

Marguerite folded her arms, avoiding eye contact with Caroline. “I don’t like this.”

“I’m not thrilled about it either,” Caroline said.

The three of them sat there for a few moments. Sophie cried softly. Marguerite subtly turned away from her mother, her shoulders set rigidly toward the wall. Caroline couldn’t stand the tension.

“I have something else for you,” she said.

Her words went unacknowledged. She wiped her eyes and picked the bag up off the floor. She was the adult. She had to act like it. Marguerite still had her back to her, so she turned to Sophie. Caroline reached into the bag and pulled out the stuffed hippo Sophie had given her after she’d been shot. She tried to give it back after she was released from the hospital, but Feef refused to take it, saying she really wanted the hippo to take care of her mommy for her. Caroline had taken it with her on almost every cross country campaign appearance when Jack wasn’t with her. It helped her feel less isolated.

She handed the hippo to Sophie. “I know you’re probably a little too old for this now but-”

Sophie took the soft plush from her mother’s hands and cradled it in her arms. “I want him,” she said. “Are you sure you don’t need him?”

If only a stuffed animal could keep her safe. Caroline would damn near strap him to her chest. “I think he’s better off with you, don’t you think? You can give him much more attention than I can. “

Sophie squeezed her eyes shut. “I will, mom.”

Caroline placed a hesitant hand on Marguerite’s shoulder. “Mo Mo?”

Marguerite slowly turned around to look at her. Her eyes were red. “Oh, I don’t think there’s anything in that black bag for me,” she said, and managed a weak smile.

Classic movie humor. Caroline tried not to think about how much the two of them were alike in that way. She could always badger Marguerite into watching all of her old favorite films with her. They had a blast watching Disney flicks and classic film musicals together. Sophie probably could have quoted The Wizard of Oz just as easily as her big sister, but classic movies bonded Caroline and Mo together. Caroline reached into the bag and pulled out a gold and blue striped scarf.

“That’s your Marquette scarf,” Marguerite said.

A mistress of the obvious, her child. “Nothing gets past you, Mo.”

“You love that scarf. You wear it all the time.”

“I do.”

Marguerite brought it up to her nose. “It smells like your perfume.”

Caroline reflexively closed her eyes so she wouldn’t start crying again. “I want you to have it.”

Marguerite held it gently in her hands. “Are you sure, mom?”

She took the scarf and wrapped it around her eldest daughter’s neck. “Absolutely.”

Marguerite leaned in on one side with Sophie on the other. Feef pressed the hippo into Caroline’s hand so that they were both holding onto him. The three of them sat on the bed crying and holding each other for a very long time. Finally

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