The Colonel's Spinster - Audrey Harrison Page 0,51
would ask for more.
Fitzwilliam moved to the other side of his cousin’s bed. Touching Anne’s hand he smiled down at her when she looked at him. “Hello, sweetheart. It is so good to see you awake.”
“Mother?” Anne croaked.
“She is well. As demanding as usual, I am led to believe,” Fitzwilliam reassured her.
Anne smiled slightly. “M-Mr. Huxley?”
“He’s here,” Fitzwilliam said. “You must not worry about anything, Anne. The important thing is that you need to get better.”
“Yes,” Anne whispered. “Mr. Huxley.”
“I promise you shall see him the next time you awaken, but I can see you are very tired. Sleep now,” Prudence said.
Anne did not argue, but let her eyelids close and was soon breathing deeply.
Fitzwilliam watched her for a few minutes before he walked to the window and blindly looked out. Prudence left him a while but eventually his tense stance removed her inner battle with herself to remain at a distance from him.
Walking over to where he stood she rested a hand on his arm. “What troubles you?”
“I am terrified she will relapse,” he admitted, not looking at Prudence.
“She is over the worst. I know there is still a long way to go before she will be fully recovered, but she has overcome the first hurdle. Have faith.”
“It has only just struck me, but it has done so quite forcefully, that if Anne died, she has little experience of life. The restrictions she’s faced have meant she has not had a season, nor a trip abroad. She has barely been to any entertainments, all because of my aunt’s selfishness.”
“There was probably some fear on our aunt’s part,” Prudence said.
“What? That Anne would find a life without her?”
“Possibly. It is not something to completely condemn our aunt for. Think of it from Aunt Catherine’s perspective. Anne is all she has.”
“It’s the same with you and your father, but he hasn’t restricted your life.”
“No, he has not. But he has a business in which he can lose himself. Plus, I have always promised I would remain close by him. He knows I will live nearby, whereas Anne could have married someone and moved to the other end of the country,” Prudence admitted.
“Is that why you refused the offers of marriage you have received?” Fitzwilliam was torturing himself. He knew that, but it did not stop him uttering the words. He inwardly cursed when Prudence removed her hand from his arm.
“Not that it is any of your business, but no. That was not the reason I refused the offers I received,” came the cool response.
“I am sorry for asking.”
“You should be.”
“The reason for my impertinence is that I can think of little else other than what we shared and what I felt when I was with you. I will always damn my family to the devil for their interference.”
Prudence sighed and walked away from Fitzwilliam. “This is not the time nor the place to go over old ground. Thinking about what happened since my return home, I have come to the conclusion that we would not have suited anyway. Oh, there is an attraction between us. I am not trying to deny that, but there needs to be more. I can barely explain what I mean, but perhaps it is summed up by my wishing for a husband to want me above everything else and put me first when it really matters. I have not yet found a man who would be prepared to do that.”
“I am sorry that you feel that way. If it helps with your annoyance towards me, things will never be the same between myself and Darcy.”
“That does not please me, believe me. It is not my hope that I would come between you and your family, but it is something between the two of you. It does not affect me, so do not remain estranged on my account.”
“I think of you constantly.”
Prudence closed her eyes. It would be so easy to go to him, to let him wrap her in his arms as he had done at Rosings. It was what she wanted. Unfortunately, her inner voice stopped her from acting though her heart wanted to capitulate. How could she risk his lack of support when they would start with his family clearly against the match? No. To face such censure as they would, the pair had to be completely in tune with each other, just as her parents had been. Fitzwilliam had shown that he was not that committed to her.
“I am going to inform Mr.