Cock & Bull - Laura Barnard Page 0,84

have no secrets between us.’ I sound more confident with that fact than I am.

He leans in, resting his forearms on the bar, a sick glint in his eye.

‘Ah, but I bet he never told you the reason he started gambling, did he?’ He smirks and I want to punch his smug face.

He has me there. I never thought to actually ask him why he’d started. I’d just assumed that he started doing it socially and it spiralled, eventually going out of control. I didn’t think he’d had some sort of issue which led him to it. Well, apart from his dad resenting him his whole life.

Some depressive event maybe? Maybe it was breaking up with Orla, who I’m quickly believing was the love of Clooney’s life. Her moving to England could have been the event that turned his world upside down.

I really wish he’d talk to me about it. For some crazy reason I thought that with us sleeping together now he might open up a bit more. But no, he seems to be able to compartmentalise everything pretty neatly.

I know he’s still hiding things from me. I feel it whenever I try to ask him something remotely personal. His muscles tense up. I don’t get how bad it could have been. I mean, yeah his heart was obviously broken by her, but how? Did she cheat?

‘Well, maybe you should ask my lad what happened just before he developed this gambling habit. That’s if you have the guts.’

‘Oh, piss off.’

I really wish I had a better come back than that, but the guy puts me on such an edge. I try and see the good in all people. Normally everyone has some redeeming feature that I cling onto, even if they are being a major thorn in my side, but I just can’t find one with him. What is his bloody problem?

He scoffs. ‘Let me know when you’re ready to give in and sell this ramshackle of a pub to me. My price stands, but the longer time goes on the lower it will drop.’

I steel my jaw. ‘I know exactly why you want to buy this pub,’ I snarl through gritted teeth. ‘You’ll have to prise the deeds out of my dead cold hands.’

He sniggers. ‘That can be arranged.’ He turns and strops out of the pub.

Did he just threaten my life? It was just a joke, right? God, with him who knows.

Ella comes out of the toilet just as the door slams after him.

‘Are you alright, Pheebs?’ She takes my arm. ‘You look like you’ve just seen a ghost.’

I laugh, but it sounds fake even to my own ears. She hasn’t noticed when I’m actually talking to one. I only realise now that I’m shaking.

‘No I’m fine. I just…’ I choke on a sob that appeared from nowhere.

‘Shit, sit down.’ She leads me to a chair. ‘What just happened?’

‘It’s just Clooney’s dad again.’ My tongue is trembling, making talking a challenge.

She balls her hands into little fists. ‘Ugh, that man is just vile! We should call the guards.’

I shake my head. ‘No, I’m fine.’ I don’t want to add to the drama and turn this into something bigger than it needs to be. That’s probably what he wants me to do.

Clooney walks in and I know he’s seen his dad by the way his shoulders are bunched up by his ears. Now I look closer as his eyes search around for me, I can see that his cheeks are flushed. His shoulders visibly relax when he spots me.

‘Phoebe.’ He rushes over, kneeling in front of me, taking my hands in his. ‘What did he do? What did he say?’ The worry etched all over his face makes me want to cry harder.

‘Nothing.’ I shake my head, feeling stupid for over-reacting. ‘I don’t even know why I’m crying. I’m fine.’

‘She’s obviously shaken up,’ Ella says, as if I’m unable to speak for myself.

‘Phoebe,’ he pleads, eyes desperate. ‘Please talk to me.’

Oh how ironic. He wants me to talk to him. For me to open up. I’ve been nothing but an open book with him since day one. Its him with all of the secrets. His secrets I’ll never learn. It makes my heart harden just enough to realise I need time on my own to gather my thoughts.

‘I’m fine, honestly. He was just trying to scare me.’ I wipe my tears away. ‘But you know what, I’m just gonna go for a lie down if that’s okay with