Cock & Bull - Laura Barnard Page 0,17

job going.’

Ugh, God. I knew he didn’t just want to help out of the goodness of his heart.

‘Just go,’ I growl. ‘We don’t have enough money to be taking anyone on right now.’ I turn, more than ready for my bed. The place can burn to the ground tonight for all I care.

‘Then how about I move in?’

I turn to face him, the stirrings of a headache dancing around my temples. ‘What?’

‘Yeah,’ Ella snorts. ‘At least buy her a drink first.’

He chuckles. ‘I mean, you can pay me with lodgings and food.’

I stare at him, trying to work out his angle. I’m too tired right now to care.

‘Fine, whatever. Help out tonight and we’ll talk about it properly another day.’

Chapter Ten

Thursday 24th September

Clooney kept to his word last night and helped Ella with everything. Suki the skunk spooned me to sleep and for once it was nice to have her company. Almost like she knew I was wounded and could do with a cuddle.

Eoghan produces amazing food. There’s no denying that. The smells that come out of that kitchen are incredible. Unfortunately, there’s also no denying that he’s an unreasonable, moody, arrogant bastard.

‘Service! Service now!’ He yells from the kitchen.

I look to Ella, both of us rolling our eyes. I know it’s my turn.

‘I said SERVICE!’ he hollers.

Jesus, anyone would think the pub was rammed and he’s rushed off his feet. It’s only our second order of the day, and it’s a cheese sandwich. It’s hardly going to get cold.

I walk into the kitchen and force a friendly smile. It’s hard after the restless night’s sleep I had. It turns out I like to sleep on my hands. It’s unbelievable how many things you do every day that involve your thumb. It still hurts like hell but the pain medication they gave me is taking the edge off.

Strangely I dreamt of Clooney’s tattoos. I tried to focus on them yesterday while they were attacking me with the scalpel. All of them are black which somehow makes them appear classier. I remember spotting a butterfly, a dove, a rose and a song verse amongst other stuff.

‘Did you not hear me calling?’ Chef snaps, throwing a tea towel over his shoulder.

He looks ridiculous, all dressed up in his white chef outfit, blue apron and stripy hat. He’s said it is kitchen regulation. Who am I to argue with him? I haven’t a clue and to be honest, anything that stops us closing down is a good call right now. I must remember that when I want nothing more than to pummel him in his stupid face.

Word is ever so slowly spreading that we’re serving food and I don’t want to stop the good news from circulating. If we carry on like this, we’ll be building up a small lunch time trade.

‘Sorry,’ I practically spit through gritted teeth. He still hasn’t apologised for not helping me yesterday when my thumb was about to fall off.

‘Table five,’ he barks, not even looking at me. ‘If you can handle that.’ He’s a bitch through and through

‘What was that?’ I can’t help but ask.

I know I’m not supposed to bite, but he riles me up like no other person I’ve ever met. Well, apart from that Clooney guy.

Me and Ella have a theory that Eoghan was ridiculously good looking when he was younger, so he had never needed to or had bothered to form an appeasing personality. Now he’s in his fifties, ugly as sin, and a miserable bastard.

‘Just checking you’re up for the job. God knows you’ve only been doing this five minutes.’

I clench my fists around the plate. Do not throw the plate at his face. There are no other local decent chefs.

‘I think you’ll find that I am more than up to the job, and that I am, in fact, your boss. It would be nice if you’d pay me a bit more respect.’

He curls his upper lip. ‘I only give respect to people that have earned it.’

That’s it. I just can’t stand this dickhead anymore.

‘You know what?’ I put the plate down, my hands shaking with rage. ‘I’ve just about—’

‘Phoebe!’ Ella says, appearing from nowhere and giving me the wide eye. ‘Why don’t you go tend to the bar and I’ll manage things here.’

I actually bite my tongue and walk to the bar, my fists clenched, needing some time to calm down. He brings out the violence in me.

I watch Ella serve the food to the customer and then walk back to