the table—the look on his face so open, so trusting, it only made me feel like more of a bastard for keeping things from them. “You might not remember this, but the night that Delilah and I recovered the Copernicus from Victoria’s house, you told me that you often needed to hear your own advice when it came to Bernard. As our boss, you repeatedly reminded us that getting the damn book back was all that mattered.”
“That I could be unnecessarily prideful in my thirst for revenge,” I added—because I did remember that conversation and how conflicted I’d felt at my righteous anger. Worried it would obscure the focus of Codex, which was always rescuing the book over capturing the thief.
Four sets of heads nodded with knowing looks. “Call it a bloodhound instinct,” Delilah said. “But it didn’t take much to get us from there to sitting right here. The worst that would happen is we found you relaxing by the pool, and we spent a few fun days with you in the city.”
“It’s hard for me to ask for help,” I said.
“Yeah we know,” all four replied in unison.
“I’m loving this by the way,” Sloane added.
I brought my hands together on the table, looked each one of my team members in the eye.
“When I was deciding where to go, I received an anonymous email from an agent at the FBI with information they felt confirmed, without a doubt, Bernard’s location here. And not just here but within a two-mile radius of The Langham Hotel and the Sherlock Holmes museum. Surveillance reports attached to the message checked out. Those other reports Sam had received about his credit card use I believe to be a red herring.”
There was an explosion of whats and are you serious and what the fucks. Delilah crossed her arms, looking rightfully irritated. “And why the hell didn’t you tell us? Seems pretty crucial, Abe.”
I chanced a glance at Henry, who seemed genuinely hurt. “I am truly, truly sorry for keeping this from you. What I’ve done, my actions, none of that reflects the kind of leader I pride myself on being. I’ve always valued integrity above all else. In that, I failed you.”
Now Sloane’s hand rested on my knee. Before I could doubt the gesture, I dropped my own hand beneath the table and curled my fingers through hers.
“It’s challenging for me to admit how personal catching Bernard feels to me; it’s challenging for me to admit I’ve always wanted to be the one man to do it where everyone else had failed. It would be the ultimate fuck you to the Bureau and to everyone that doubted private detectives could be as successful.” I swallowed past the urge to stop. “I had no money, no warrant, no client, no jurisdiction. I was comfortable risking myself. Much less so risking all of you.”
I set my eyes on each one of them, didn’t shy away from the mixture of loyalty and anger I saw there. “Unlike my previous statements, I do feel more than a mild affection for all of you. Tomorrow, nothing could happen. We could take a massive swing and miss again. The thought of asking all of you to have hope one more time…”
I trailed off—smacking hard against my limits of emotional vulnerability. Between my night, and morning, with Sloane and this hard conversation, my body felt like a marathon runner’s at mile twenty-three.
“It’s hard to risk the ones you care about the most,” Freya said softly.
Nodding, throat tight, I managed, “It’s no excuse. Please, forgive me.”
“I think we can make that happen,” Sam said. “By lording it over you for months and accepting your apology gifts.” He flashed me a shit-eating grin. “Sir.”
“Of course,” I promised. “A genuine bounty of donuts awaits.”
I was still focused on Henry, who had yet to say a word. Now, he was shaking his head, a tiny smile on his face. “I can’t say I haven’t had those same dreams. I get it, I do. But we’re doing this together, Abe. Like we were always supposed to.”
I let out a big exhale of relief. Placed my hand on Henry’s wrist, who clapped his on mine with a look of understanding I wasn’t sure I deserved yet. He was right, though—Henry and I had inadvertently started this journey together, sitting in that claustrophobic room at the McMaster’s Library. We would get him—together.
“Sloane and I have a lot to catch you up on. We’ve had an interesting few days, to