Citizen Insane - By Karen Cantwell Page 0,5
think, who was she asking for?” I snapped my fingers. “Oh! That’s right. She was looking for YOU! Why would she be looking for you, Howard?”
“Bunny Bergen? Is Bunny Bergen in that van?” At the mention of Bunny’s name, every suited and uniformed man within hearing distance looked in our direction.
I squinted suspiciously. “What’s going on here?”
Howard grabbed my elbow and moved back while motioning to a blue-jacketed EMT standing beside the ambulance. “Can I get your help over here? Bring a blanket.” He turned to face me. “Barb, tell me what happened.”
“How’s the fettucini at Fiorenza’s?”
His body stiffened. He blinked three times then looked away.
“I went out for dessert with Roz and Peggy last night,” I continued. “You know that yummy lava cake at Scottie’s Pub?”
He turned back to me, his jaw set hard, but his dark eyes soft, revealing a whisper of emotion. Was it guilt? “Barb, let me—”
“Parking was hard to find though, so we left the car over by Fiorenza’s.”
“I can explain.”
“Which of course, meant we had to walk past Fiorenza’s to get to Scottie’s.”
“Listen to me—”
“I always look into Fiorenza’s when I walk by, because, as you know, a person is likely to see a familiar face in there. It’s such a popular restaurant and all.”
“Do you want to hear what I have to say?”
“No, Romeo, I don’t. Keep your dalliances to yourself, just don’t go on pretending that this marriage means anything to you.”
Howard’s face reddened like coals when they’re stoked. His fists tightened. Not that I thought he’d hit me—he wasn’t the wife-hitting sort. But I’d made him mad. Plenty mad. He was silent for a few seconds (it seemed like years) while he stared at me with those intense, deep brown eyes. I stood my ground, though. I was the woman wronged, after all.
Finally, he spoke. Slow and deliberate like Christopher Walken on sedatives. “I’m on duty and have a job to do. We’ll talk about this later. Now what happened with Bunny Bergen?”
“I found her in our front yard mumbling and acting like Rainman when he missed Jeopardy. Said she ran over a rabbit in her driveway, so she came over to our house looking for you. Do I need to ask why she was looking for you? Casanova?”
“Is she in the backseat?”
“Yeah, with Roz.”
“Is she calm?”
“Now she is. I guess. You didn’t answer my question.”
Howard finally gave directions to the EMT who stared awkwardly at the sky during our little lovers spat. “She’s in the backseat. See if she needs care.”
Then he guided me toward the passenger side of the van. He brought his face close to mine and spoke in hushed tones. “Listen to me. Go back to the house and stay there—all three of you. I’ll have to send Agent Bell over to take statements.” He pointed to a tall, suited man who also wore an FBI badge and said with a half-hearted smile, “Don’t worry, he’s a good guy.”
I wasn’t warming to Howard’s stab at humor but his cologne was starting to bake my cookies. Fighting the urge to jump him and give everyone a show, I played coy. “Can’t wait.”
He stopped me as I headed back toward the van. “Barb?”
“What?”
“I’ll come by tonight and explain.”
“Fine. But I promised Roz I’d go to the PTA meeting, so it will have to be after.”
“You hate PTA meetings.”
“I do. She needs me there. Some problem with the yearbook.”
“The yearbook at Tulip Tree Elementary? What’s the problem? You’re not involved are you?” His concern seemed oddly out of place. He was probably trying to feign interest in my life to throw me off the scent of his philandering.
“Slow down law man—I have no idea what the problem is. It’s a grade school yearbook for crying out loud. The company probably made the margins too wide. But I’ll be sure to alert you and your Bureau buddies if it looks like any federal laws were broken.”
He relaxed and came in again for a smooch, but I still wasn’t obliging. I needed to hear his story first.
By the time I had plopped back into Peggy’s van, Bunny was long gone.
Peggy was spewing questions before I had the door closed. “Holy canoli, girl! What’s going on? Why are they here? What did Howard say?”
“I don’t know, I don’t know, and nothing. I take that back—he did say that we have to go back to my house until an agent comes and asks us questions.”
Roz put her face between the two front seats. “Questions