A Christmas Break - Annabelle Jacobs Page 0,54

sleep on my back, and I was tired from constantly waking up.

I shuffled into the kitchen and took a seat at the breakfast bar.

“Morning.” Cole smiled at me as he wandered in. “Looking forward to today?”

“Yeah.” I scowled. “Can’t wait.”

“Whoa.” Cole stopped getting cereal out of the cupboard and turned to stare at me. “Who pissed in your cornflakes?”

“Sorry,” I muttered, scrubbing a hand over my eyes. “I’m just a bit fed up. Didn’t mean to snap.” Christian had been called into work, so Cole was taking me to the hospital instead. Which he was far too pleased about.

He set his breakfast on the worktop next to me. “You had anything to eat?”

“No.” I hadn’t felt like anything when I’d got up.

“Want some cereal? Or toast?”

I should probably try and eat something. I was never too good on an empty stomach. “I’ll have some toast, but you sit down. I’ll get it.” I stood before he could object and put a couple of slices of bread in the toaster.

Cole took the hint and sat to eat his breakfast.

But of course I couldn’t manage to even make my own fucking breakfast.

I put the toast on a plate and set it on the breakfast bar along with the butter and a knife. “Any chance you could butter it for me?”

Cole glanced up and nodded as he swallowed. “Of course.”

I sat down and he slid the plate of buttered toast towards me.

“Thanks.”

He waited until I’d taken a big bite before asking, “You spoken to Finn much this week?” He sounded way too nonchalant, so I gathered he knew full well I had.

“We’ve swapped a few texts.”

He half-laughed, half-choked on his Weetabix. “A few?”

“Fine.” I rolled my eyes. “I’ve texted him every night. Which you probably already knew, so why are you asking?”

He set his spoon down and shuffled on his stool to face me better. “Because Finn is super tight-lipped where the two of you are concerned and I wondered what was going on. You know,” he added with a pointed look. “Considering I’m your best mate and everything.”

Guilt hit me hard and I sighed.

He was right. We told each other everything, always had.

“Fuck. I’m sorry.”

He nudged me gently with his arm. “I know it must be a bit weird this time, but it doesn’t have to be. I don’t want to know details, Jas, because that would be gross.”

He nudged me again and I laughed. “Noted.”

“But I’d like to know how my best mate’s feeling. And if there’s anything I can do to help.”

That I could answer. “I’m feeling . . . confused and a little frustrated, I guess.” I met his gaze. “I know part of it’s because of my wrist and everything, but I’ve spoken to Finn every night since he left, and yet we don’t really say anything. You know?”

He gave me a commiserating look. “Because that sort of stuff needs to be said in person?”

“Yeah, exactly.” I poked at my toast before taking a bite, chewing slowly. “And I know all that, but I just want to get it all out in the open and know where we both stand.”

“Fair enough.” He finished off his cereal before pushing his bowl to the side. “Have you told him that?”

“What?”

“How you feel.” He fidgeted in his seat. “I can virtually guarantee Finn’s feeling much the same. You can tell him that your frustrated, confused, or whatever without having to talk about the reasons why. Maybe it’d help if you each knew the other was feeling the same way?” He frowned. “Do you get what I’m saying?”

I did. “That’s a lot to put in a text message.”

He rolled his eyes. “Duh. You could always . . . oh, I don’t know . . . call him?”

I winced. Texting was easy. I had time to get it right, so I didn’t say something stupid. Talking on the phone seemed . . . intimate.

Like we haven’t already been closer than that.

“Yeah, I guess I could.” Judging from the look on his face, I didn’t sound all that keen.

“Trust me,” he said, giving my shoulder a squeeze. “It’ll make you both feel better.”

I didn’t get a chance to call Finn that evening because he called me.

Nervousness hit me like a hundred butterflies in my belly when I saw his name flash up. “Hey,” I answered, hoping I didn’t sound as weird as I suddenly felt.

“Hey.” His voice sounded different over the phone but still like him, and it made me smile. “I didn’t wake