Christmas for Beginners - Carole Matthews Page 0,80

but I realise that my social skills and capacity for small talk are still woefully lacking.

‘I saw a vegan place across the road,’ I say to Lucas. ‘I think it was still open. Want to duck out and get something to eat?’

‘Yeah.’ Lucas looks weak with relief.

I try to catch Shelby’s eye to tell him that we’re popping out for a few minutes to grab some food, but I can’t and there’s no hope of getting across the room to him. Instead, I send him a text. Hopefully, we’ll be back before he notices we’re gone.

After the fug of the bar, the fresh air on the street hits me and a gulp it down gratefully.

‘That was hideous,’ I say to Lucas as we dash over the road.

‘The bar was the best bit,’ he counters and makes me laugh.

The vegan café – Green World – is still open and we order wraps with falafel, red pepper hummus and spinach. But it’s the cup of hot tea that I’m most grateful for.

I text Matt. Everything OK?

All still standing. Don’t worry.

At last, some good news.

We sit and eat in silence, Lucas wolfing down his food as if he hasn’t been fed for a week rather than a few hours. Eventually, Lucas stops chewing long enough to say, ‘It’s better when it’s just me and you.’

‘Soon it will be a lot more than that.’

‘We’re not going to be able to tell him tonight,’ Lucas notes. ‘He’s in his own little Shelby World.’

‘I know.’ I look at Lucas and smile sadly. ‘We can’t put it off for ever, but now isn’t the right time. Perhaps there’ll be an opportunity.’

We both know our chances are slim.

‘I know you think he’s the best thing since sliced bread, but we’re barely on his radar. His poncy actor friends are more important to him. You saw that. This is your future,’ he warns with an insight that belies his years.

‘It’s his world, his work.’

‘You keep telling yourself that,’ Lucas says as he polishes off his wrap.

When he pushes away his plate, I venture, ‘We’d better get back before he misses us.’

Lucas groans, but stands up and we walk back to Club Escape. It’s late now, the street only peopled by drunks and those soon to be drunk. I have never wanted my own bed more in my life.

We go into the bar and, sure enough, Shelby is still holding court.

‘We should just go back to the hotel,’ Lucas says. ‘He doesn’t give a fuck.’

‘We’ll say we’re leaving,’ I tell him. ‘Then we’ll head back there.’

So we squeeze and ease through the crowd until I reach Shelby’s elbow.

‘Hey,’ I say over the noise and he turns round.

Rather than being pleased to see me, his face darkens. ‘Where the hell have you been? I’ve looked everywhere for you!’

‘Where?’ I ask. Seems to me he’s in exactly the same place as when we left half an hour ago.

‘I didn’t know where you’d gone,’ he insists.

‘I couldn’t attract your attention. You were busy.’ It sounds barbed. ‘I texted you.’

He pulls his phone out of his pocket and reads my text. ‘I didn’t hear it. It’s so bloody noisy in here.’

Quite.

‘Lucas and I are just heading back to the hotel. It’s late and it’s been a long day.’

‘The party’s still in full swing,’ Shelby says.

‘There’s no need for you to leave. Stay. Enjoy yourself.’

Shelby steps away from his friends and pulls me to one side. ‘Tonight didn’t go as I’d planned,’ he says. ‘I’m truly sorry. I thought we’d have time for a nice dinner before the show.’

‘It doesn’t matter. Really.’ I’m disappointed, but this is

Shelby’s life and it’s me who is the square peg in the round hole – as always. He could have made more effort, it’s true, but – I sigh to myself – he didn’t and that’s life too.

‘I should have introduced you around to the rest of the cast.’ He takes my hand. ‘Have another glass of champagne. Come and meet them now.’

I can’t think of anything worse. ‘I’m tired, Shelby,’ I say. ‘We’ll leave you to it. I’ll see you when you get back to the hotel.’

‘Of course, I won’t stay. Give me five minutes. Let me say goodnight to everyone and then I’m all yours.’

‘If you’re sure.’

Shelby moves back into his crowd. I turn to Lucas and puff out a heavy breath. He pulls out his phone. ‘He’ll be an hour,’ he mutters.

In the end, Shelby is considerably longer than five minutes but less than an hour.