to be loved and cared for, to be part of something beautiful and fine, to have the respect of those she admires."
"Yes, well, I'll take your word for it," said Miro.
"No, Miro, you see it," Jane insisted.
"Yes, I see it," Miro answered. "But I gave up trying years ago. Quara's need was and is so great that a person like me could be swallowed up in it a dozen times over. I had problems of my own then. Don't condemn me because I wrote her off. Her barrel of misery has depth enough to hold a thousand bushels of happiness."
"I don't condemn you," said Jane. "I just ... I had to know that you saw how much she loves you and needs you. I needed you to be ..."
"You needed me to be like Ender," said Miro.
"I needed you to be your own best self," said Jane.
"I loved Ender too, you know. I think of him as every man's best self. And I don't resent the fact that you would like me to be at least some of the things he was to you. As long as you also want a few of the things that are me alone, and no part of him."
"I don't expect you to be perfect," said Jane. "And I don't expect you to be Ender. And you'd better not expect perfection from me, either, because wise as I'm trying to be right now, I'm still the one who knocked your sister down."
"Who knows?" said Miro. "That may have turned you into Quara's dearest friend."
"I hope not," said Jane. "But if it's true, I'll do my best for her. After all, she's going to be my sister now."
"So you were ready," said the Hive Queen.
"Without knowing it, yes, we were," said Human.
"And you are part of her, all of you."
"Her touch is gentle," said Human, "and her presence in us is easily borne. The mothertrees don't mind her. Her vividness invigorates them. And if having her memories is strange to them, it brings more variety to their lives than they have ever had before."
"So she's a part of all of us," said the Hive Queen. "What she is now, what she has become, is part hive queen, part human, and part pequenino."
"Whatever she does, no one can say she doesn't understand us. If someone had to play with godlike powers, better her than anyone."
"I'm jealous of her, I confess," the Hive Queen said. "She's a part of you as I can never be. After all our conversations, I still have no notion of what it is to be one of you."
"Nor do I understand anything more than a glimmer of the way you think," said Human. "But isn't that a good thing, too? The mystery is endless. We will never cease to surprise each other."
"Till death ends all surprises," said the Hive Queen.
Chapter 14
"HOW THEY COMMUNICATE WITH ANIMALS"
"If only we were wiser or better people,
perhaps the gods would explain to us
the mad, unbearable things they do."
from The God Whispers of Han Qing-jao
The moment Admiral Bobby Lands received the news that the ansible connections to Starways Congress were restored, he gave the order to the entire Lusitania Fleet to decelerate forthwith to a speed just under the threshold of invisibility. Obedience was immediate, and he knew that within an hour, to any telescopic observer on Lusitania, the whole fleet would seem to spring into existence from nowhere. They would be hurtling toward a point near Lusitania at an astonishing speed, their massive foreshields still in place to protect them from taking devastating damage from collisions with interstellar particles as small as dust.
Admiral Lands's strategy was simple. He would arrive near Lusitania at the highest possible speed that would not cause relativistic effects; he would launch the Little Doctor during the period of nearest approach, a window of no more than a couple of hours; and then he would bring his whole fleet back up to relativistic speeds so rapidly that when the M.D. Device went off, it would not catch any of his ships within its all-destroying field.
It was a good, simple strategy, based on the assumption that Lusitania had no defenses. But to Lands, that assumption could not be taken for granted. Somehow the Lusitanian rebels had acquired enough resources that for a period of time near the end of the voyage, they were able to cut off all communications between the fleet and the rest of humanity. Never mind that the problem had been