Chasing Secrets - Jessica Sorensen Page 0,2
used to start them intentionally?”
I know I used to believe genies were violent creatures, but when I got to know Asher, I changed my mind.
“He only did it to creatures who deserved it. He wasn’t, like, beating up innocent creatures or anything like that,” Arrow quickly adds. “ I think he only did it because it was the only source of outlet for all the stuff he was going through.”
I can kind of understand that. Not that I was ever violent, but I got into trouble a lot because I was trying to deal with stuff, like my curse, the wrong way.
“You mean, with his father and Maxton?”
He nods then hesitates. “And you.”
“You mean with the curse?” I ask, and he nods again. “Oh.” I press my lips together, my heart beating wildly in my chest. I’m not even positive why it’s going crazy. I just keep thinking about Asher and the curse and how he struggled with it like I did. We get each other on that level, which frightens me a little. I’m so used to dealing with everything all by myself, but that hasn’t been the case lately, and it’s kind of weird because it’s kind of … well, wonderful. And I haven’t had a lot of wonderful in my life, which has me worried that something will happen that’ll cause me to lose it—lose the guys.
“But like I said,” Arrow continues, “Asher won’t start a fight here unless someone starts it first. Not with you around. He’d never put you at risk like that. Plus, he doesn’t have as many issues as he did before, now that Maxton is here and the curse is …” He trails off, shrugging and lowering his gaze as he scuffs the tip of his boot against the floor.
“True,” I agree. “Although, I think my existence brings on a whole other set of issues.”
His gaze collides with mine. “Har, your existence brings nothing but good. Don’t ever think otherwise.”
I let out a quiet sigh. “I appreciate you saying that, but after what Maxton told us about me … there are issues with me existing. What I am—what I can do—that’s a major issue.”
He shakes his head while carrying my gaze. “Just because you have the power to do bad things, doesn’t mean you’re going to use it to do bad stuff. Look at Asher. Most genies spend their lives tormenting and cursing wishers’ lives. But he chooses not to. In fact, he’s rarely even used his lamp.”
“Yeah … I guess I can kind of see your point,” I say. However, I can’t help thinking about that power I felt in my chest a few times and how part of me wanted to release it.
Destroy the world, Axel had whispered to me in my dreams once.
Suddenly, Arrow splays his fingers across my cheeks and cups my face between his hands. It’s a strange move for him—touching me so openly—but I love it, love the feel of his metal and flesh across my skin. Love that he’s touching me even when he knows what I am.
“You’re the kindest creature I’ve ever met,” he tells me. “And you need to start realizing that because, if you don’t, if you keep questioning your character, it’s going to weaken you. And that weakness will make it easier for other creatures to get ahold of you, and then they can use you for whatever they want.” His throat muscles work as he swallows hard.
“You sound like you’re speaking from experience,” I say quietly.
He hesitates, chewing on his bottom lip. “You know a little bit about my past, right? How I had a master? How I’m not like other cyborgs?”
I nod, placing my palm against his chest where I can feel his heart beating rapidly. The only cyborg with a real heart.
“Well, for a while, I hated myself because of what I was—am. And during that time is when my master had the most hold over me because I didn’t fight back, didn’t think I was good enough to fight back.” He skims the pad of his thumb along my cheekbone. “If I had, I may not have been under his control for as long. I may have even freed myself instead of Asher freeing me.” He dips his head and levels his gaze with mine. “So I want you to be strong, okay? And only think good things about yourself. Because, in the end, what you are on the inside is going to show on the outside.