Chasing Charli - Kat Mizera Page 0,72
sparking a torrent of conversation in Finnish, but Charli barely heard him.
“Miikka, stop.” She held up a hand wearily. “I don’t want to fight. I don’t want things to be ugly between us, okay? I want you to be happy and to have all the things you want in life. They just won’t be with me, so it’s better for us to end it now, before things get too serious.”
He gazed at her. “We live together. I took you to Finland to meet my family. I flew a thousand hours to be here for you and your family—who you don’t even like that much. We’re renovating our house! And you don’t think we’re serious?”
She didn’t say anything, simply looking away.
“Do you love me?” he asked after a moment.
“That has nothing to do with it.”
“That has everything to do with it!” he snapped.
“I don’t know what you want me to say.”
“Do. You. Love. Me.” His eyes bore into hers, so intense she couldn’t look away no matter how much she wanted to.
“You know I do.” Her voice was barely audible. “But—”
“What if I could prove it to you?”
“What are you talking about?” she asked in confusion.
“What if I found a way to show you that you made the right decision? For your son and for yourself?”
She shook her head. “The records are sealed. There’s no way you’re going to get any information about where he is or how he is or any of it.”
“What if I can?” He was insistent.
“It’s not going to make any difference,” she said. “I wish you wouldn’t make this harder than it has to be.”
“You think I’m just going to walk away?” He shook his head firmly. “That’s not the man I am.”
“But what if that’s what I want?” she countered.
“Will it change your mind if I can show you that you’re wrong?” he asked again.
“I’ve already told you that—”
“Just answer me,” he interrupted impatiently.
“You think you’re going to find my son? Fine. Knock yourself out. But I don’t want to do this anymore. My parents are already asking embarrassing questions like when we’re getting married and I don’t want them to get the wrong idea.”
“We are getting married. You’re just upset.”
“I’m being realistic.” She met his gaze. “Please. If you love me, you won’t make this hard on us.”
“Why are you so stubborn?” he demanded, throwing up his hands. “I love you. You love me. Why must everything be so complicated?”
“Because I’m trying to not hurt you!” she cried out in frustration.
“I’m a grown man. I can handle it.”
She met his eyes. “Now who’s being stubborn? Just go back to Finland, okay? Enjoy your family and let me deal with my shit. I have enough on my plate without having to fight with you too.”
Charli instantly regretted her harsh words when she saw the hurt in Miikka’s eyes, but then he just nodded.
“Fine. You want me to go, I’ll go, but this isn’t the end, my love.” He turned and stalked towards the elevator bank.
Shit.
What had she done and what was Miikka going to do?
29
Miikka was too tired to get back on a plane so he got something to eat and found a hotel room near the airport, hoping to take a nap. The next time he opened his eyes, it was morning and he realized he’d slept nearly sixteen hours. He sat up and stretched, yesterday’s events running through his mind. He wasn’t so much upset with Char-lot as frustrated. If he truly believed she wouldn’t make a good mother, or that she genuinely didn’t want to have kids, he’d have to think long and hard about what kind of future they would have.
But that wasn’t the case. She wanted kids so much she taught five-year-olds. He’d seen the look on her face when she’d held Matthew, and it had been one of pure longing. She didn’t just want to be a mother, she needed to be one. Maybe not now, but in a few years, she would be a radiant, kind, doting mother, and he wanted to be the man to make that happen for her.
This ridiculous notion that giving up a child at seventeen made her somehow unworthy, or that she didn’t have any maternal instincts, had obviously been driven into her by someone. Her mother maybe? He wasn’t sure, but he wasn’t going to just give up. He’d finally found the woman of his dreams and he wasn’t going to let her walk away. Not like this.
The question was what to