Chase the Pain (Amatucci Family #1) - Sadie Jacks Page 0,49

nearly inaudible. Her gnarled hands patted my arm.

“I’m sorry, Grams. I’ll try to bulk back up for you.” I’d have to buy a whole new set of shirts if I got any bigger. But this was the only woman who owned my heart. I’d do anything to make her happy.

A ghost of a smile passed over her mouth. “Good. My big strong boy needs to be healthy and vibrant. Not wasting away because he sits behind his desk too long. Ashcroft men are hearty. Not like those namby-pamby Penn boys. Oh, honey, I could tell you stories that would make your ears burn about your grandfather, my husband. He was so big and strong. Horny as a rabbit. But, oh my stars, did he make me feel good.”

I laughed. My grandfather had been the runt of the Ashcroft line. Which made him about average height in today’s world. He had been a beast of a guy though. Thighs the size of trunks, arms like mountains.

“I could do the same thing, Grams. So make sure you share accordingly.” I petted her hand.

She slapped at me. “Oh, you. You shouldn’t be telling ladies about your sexual conquests.”

“I’m just following your lead, you dirty old bird.” I kissed her knuckles. “Everything I know about how I treat ladies, I learned from you.”

Not exactly true, but I wasn’t about to send my Grams into an early grave with the reality of my sexual preferences.

“Then you treat them like princesses.” She dipped her chin in authority. “Good. That’s how you’re supposed to treat the love of your life. None of the wishy-washy bullpoop that I see on the television today. Once you find your lady, you wrap her up tight and never let her go.”

Love was for idiots and fools. I was neither. Grams wouldn’t be around long enough for me to find that unicorn. The idea that I was losing her faster than should have been possible slapped me in the face again.

There was nothing I could do. No amount of money I could donate. Nothing could stop the ravages of time and a deteriorating brain. Dementia was stealing my favorite human and I was helpless and hopeless to stop it.

Her breathing evened out again as she fell asleep. The nurse came over, checked Grams’ vitals. “She’s good. Just worn out.”

I nodded. Checked my watch. “Where’s Amatucci?”

The nurse shook her head. “I have no idea who that is, I’m sorry.”

I nodded again. Getting to my feet, I leaned down and pressed a kiss to my grandmother’s papery cheek. “I’ll be back soon, Grams. Hang in there for me.”

I walked out of the private room and started towards the main reception desk. Amatucci and Willow were coming from the opposite direction. I studied Willow’s body as she made her way down the hall. Her legs were moving a little better, but she was still needing to use Rafael as a crutch as she walked.

She saw me watching her. A slight flush rose to her cheeks as she gave me an awkward wave.

I lifted my chin, hurried my steps slightly. “How did it go?” I asked.

She shrugged. “At least Steph talked to me. That was my biggest worry, that she would just stand back and go about her business.”

I nodded. Looked at Rafael. “Did the nurse do a good job?”

He looked at me like I was crazy. “I’m not a forensic nurse, man. Nor was I in the room.”

“And my answer should have been enough for you. It was my appointment, not Rafe’s.” Willow glared at me.

My inner voice mocked me. Way to go, shithead. How many times do we need to go over not alienating the woman you want in your bed?

Wait. What? Who the fuck said anything about getting her in my bed? She’s getting hooked to the cross where I can use her how I want for as long as I want. My bed wasn’t for subs. Ever.

Keep thinking that, jacknozzle. You won’t get her at all. You don’t deserve her anyway.

I gritted my teeth. I knew that. It didn’t matter, but I did know that. I was going to have her anyways.

I nodded at the woman causing so much inner turmoil. “You’re right. I apologize. I should have taken your word on the matter.”

We all turned to walk towards the front door.

I put out my arm, waited for Willow to grab it.

She took it almost immediately, a look of relief on her face. “Thank you. Standing for the last hour on cement